Eh. Dunno where this came from, precisely.
Post EW, yaoi, ooc, au, written after four hours of Eva...
Not mine, just channeling for my muse again.

What Words Can't Say by Lys ap Adin

Even after all this time, he doesn't like for me to tell him I love him. It still makes him uncomfortable, edgy... Perhaps he doesn't like the sensation of confinement and commitment that those words bring. Or, more likely, it frightens him.

It's strange, how vulnerable he can actually be. After all, love is supposed to be about strength and joy, ne?

...Maybe it is for other people, but not for scarred ex-pilots who've seen too much, felt too much, and been too deeply hurt.

Aishiteru. I love you. Words that roll easily off the tongue for many, that ring hollow and empty from constant use. It took me a long time to realize that this feeling that I have for Duo is what they call love... and it took me even longer to be able to admit it to him. Even now, the words don't precisely come easily to me... I am not by nature an outspoken man, nor am I prone to bursts of sentiment.

Neither is he, for that matter. Yes, he is talkative, and yes, he's given to almost unseemly displays of emotion. However, should one observe closely, he rarely gives away his inner thoughts or betrays his true depth of feeling.

I know people believe that I am the closed one, the silent one, the passive one. Let them think that if they will. I know the truth of how very wary Duo is--how very scared he is. I know he fears loving, because he fears losing even more. And I know that he's very superstitious, believing that by avoiding the verbal affirmation of how we feel, that he can avert what he calls the Maxwell charm.

Because I love him, I find other ways of telling him. Tactile ways. Brushing his hair, holding him... a hand resting on his shoulder or brushing his knee. I am there when he wakes in the night, pulse racing and breath rasping in his throat as old demons haunt him. When words can't save him, can't let him know that I will always be here for him in one way or another, these things can.




^_^ Okay, this is me heading off to bed now. Feedback, please?