This is a piece of rampant stupidity inspired by what I found waiting for me at the foot of my bed this morning and Trowa-bat's request for noise...
Uh, no warnings... except for weirdness... and it's sort of shounen ai...

Creatures of the Devil by Lys ap Adin
Part One (Duo)

Heero sat bolt upright in bed as a shriek of sheer terror echoed through the apartment, reaching for his gun. Within moments Duo, a blur of chestnut hair, wild violet eyes, and pale limbs, streaked out of the bathroom, hurling himself into Heero's arms.

Heero stared down at his shaking lover, confused. "Nani?" he asked.

"It was horrible," Duo whimpered, trying to hide his face in Heero's shoulder. "It's huge, and nasty, and it tried to eat me!"

Heero blinked. "Duo, what the hell are you talking about?"

"It was the monster spider from hell... go kill it for me," Duo pleaded.

Heero restrained his laughter carefully. "It's only a bug, baka."

Duo shook his head violently. "Not this one... It's *huge*, Heero... at least this big." He demonstrated a circumference of a dinner plate with his hands. "And it was hairy, and black... go kill it!"

*How do I get stuck doing these things?* Heero wondered, getting up and grabbing a sneaker. Thus armed, he braved the bathroom and the spider from hell within.

A few moments later, he stuck his head back out of the door... "Duo, I don't *see* a spider."

"It's definitely there," Duo told him. "It's probably hiding so that it can jump out and kill you."

Heero rolled his eyes. "Baka." He resumed his search... and found nothing. "Duo, are you sure you saw a spider?"

"You think I'm lying?" Duo asked indignantly. Goaded by stung pride, he left the bed. Hiding behind Heero, he cautiously poked his head around his lover's shoulder and pointed. "See? There it is! Kill it!"

Heero followed the accusing finger... and saw a tiny, fuzzy black spider hiding in the corner behind the toilet. "I still can't believe you're scared of spiders," he muttered, moving in for the kill.

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~~Owari~~

Stupid, ne? <shrugs> I *hate* spiders. They're creatures of the devil... right now one is laying siege to my bedroom. Can't go in there. It'll get me. <shivers> Heero! Come and destroy the spider for me too!

Heero: Baka.

Emily (who is a wimp when it comes to creepy crawlies...)