Heh. I know this isn't what you mean by "clubbing" but damned if I couldn't help writing it.

Yaoi. Verrrrry weird. Nerf bats.

~~~
Clubbing

"Ow! Hey! Damn it, Heero, that braid is not a leash! Let go!"

"Hn." Heero regarded the braid in his fist thoughtfully. "But it's so convenient."

Duo yanked the braid away and put his hands on his hips. "Look, Heero, you are not a Neanderthal, and I am not the woman you're going to club over the head and drag back to your cave, got that? So stop yanking me around by my hair!"

"...okay."

{a few days later}

Duo was innocently reading a book when it happened.

Quatre raced into the room. "Duo, come quick, Heero's finally snapped!"

"...huh?" Duo blinked and looked up just in time to see Heero stride in, wearing... a Tarzan outfit? and carrying a nerf bat. Before anyone really had time to react, he whonked Duo over the head several times with the bat, grabbed the braid, and dragged his lover out of the room--by the braid, naturally.

Some time later--okay, several hours later--Duo finally gathered his wits enough to ask questions. "Heero, what the hell was that all about?"

"You said only Neanderthals get to drag their mates around by the hair, right? I improvised."

Duo stared at him. "And people say I'm weird."

~Owari~

Pointless, yes, I know, but I got the image of Heero whapping Duo over the head with a nerf bat and it wouldn't go away.