And, after not so long an absence as before... I give you BBU p3. <sweat> Thanks in no small part to a small group of people who poked, prodded, begged, pleaded, and occasionally whined in order to make me "write faster, damn it!"

All I will say is that you asked for it.

Warnings: Yaoi. AU to my au. OOC. Tasuki being his charming self. Weirdness. Spoilers for FY, sometimes GW, and, in a sense, O&O. Also, this is the <cough> less serious of the two crossovers. I. e., I'm doing all the funny/random/strange stuff in this that I couldn't do in O&O.

In order to understand this, you'll have to read the previous parts of Okane and Omae o Korosu and BBU under Lys ap Adin at http://www.geocities.com/fenris_wolf0

Not my anime. Though I can dream.

Braided Bakas, Unite!
part three

"Inventory time."

"Huh?" The group sitting around the table, forming plans for the journey to Sailo, had almost forgotten Heero's presence in their midst. (Duo, on the other hand, had yet to go five minutes without asking a question, offering an opinion, or cracking a joke.)

"What the hell are you talking about?" Tasuki asked, looking at Heero.

Heero pointed at Duo. "Empty those pockets, I want to know what we have to work with."

Duo pouted. "Saa, Heero, I bet you'd ask a lady what she carries in her purse, too, ne?" He started digging around in the first pocket. "Let's see... three hair ties... one gun, plus a full clip... a pack of bubble gum... hey, there's my watch! I wondered where I'd left it... one swiss army knife... Hey, Heero, wanna screw?" Duo smirked and tossed the spare screw at his partner.

"Baka." Heero caught the screw and regarded the small pile of stuff on the table. "Do the other pocket, too."

Miaka stared. "You mean all that stuff fits in one pocket?"

"Sure! Why else would I wear these things, eh? Surely you didn't think my hips were really this wide?" Duo switched pockets and began a new litany. "Knife... two more hair ties... lube---"

Heero lifted an eloquent eyebrow as Miaka blushed.

"A guy never knows when he's gonna get lucky," Duo leered at Heero. "A band-aid... piece of peppermint candy... so that's where my math homework went! And here I blamed it on the dog... a pencil stub... and pocket lint. Happy now, Heero?"

Apparently satisfied, Heero shrugged. "You can put it away."

Duo proceeded to make the assortment of his belongings disappear. "Oi, gonna give me that screw or what?"

Heero smirked. "Later."

The Suzaku seishi looked at each other, reactions ranging from amused to embarrassed. "You certainly have quite an influence on Heero no da," Chichiri finally observed.

Duo grinned. "Call it the Maxwell charm."

"I was beginning to wonder if he was even human," Tasuki put in.

Heero glared at them. "Hn."

Nuriko laughed. "You know you like it, Hee-chan."

Duo looked at Heero. "That reminds me... Hee--"

"Duo, I will kill you."

Duo pouted some more. "You didn't even know what I was going to say."

"Yes I did."

"You never let me have any fun."

Tamahome sighed. "And I thought Duo was bad by himself."

Heero paused slightly, seeing a dark flicker in Duo's eyes and making a note of it. "His performances always improve with an audience."

Duo's eyes went wide, and he promptly clamped both hands across his mouth to prevent his guffaws from escaping.

Nuriko digested this, and grinned. "Really? Care to prove that, Hee-chan?"

"I believe this conversation is no longer appropriate," Mitsukake said gravely. "Chiriko..."

The youngest seishi sighed quietly. "I know... oyasumi nasai." He and the healer left.

"I think I'll go to bed too," Miaka said hastily, rising. Tamahome wordlessly followed her.

"Nuriko, you're driving them off with your hentai ways," Tasuki chuckled.

Duo, finally reaching a point where he was only chuckling, managed to comment. "But it was Heero who said it!"

"Baka. That's not what I meant." Heero reflected for a moment. "Although I suppose it would be true in that sense too."

"Oyasumi no da!" Chichiri fled with as much dignity as he could.

"Shit, he's cracking jokes," Tasuki said, amazed. "He really is human."

Duo put a fingers to his lips. "Shhhh, it's a secret."

"Enough," Heero said firmly. "For maximum efficiency, we need sleep."

Nuriko groaned. "Still the mission, Hee-chan?"

"Always the mission," Duo snorted, with a faint seriousness to his tone.

Heero smiled faintly. "Not always." He tossed the screw at Duo.

Duo's eyes lit up. "Ninmu ryoukai!"

As they hurried away, Nuriko looked over to Tasuki. "Oi, Tasuki, mind if I bunk with you tonight?" he asked wryly.

"Shit, you don't actually think they're gonna..." Tasuki paused. "Ah, hell, at least you don't snore... me and Chichiri can make room I guess."


"Sugoi," Duo breathed, snuggling a little closer to Heero.

Ever pragmatic, Heero snorted. "It wasn't that good."

Duo laughed. "Not that. You've never been this willing to cuddle with me... before."

"Hn." Heero pulled Duo a little closer. "You and Tamahome don't get along."

"Uh... no. Definitely not. I had assume he was you, and he really didn't appreciate that. He's better now, though. Guess he prefers being in his own body." Having the real Heero back considerably mellowed Duo's feelings toward Tamahome. "It's not important. So, what's with this Hee-chan business?"


Duo lifted his head to look at Heero directly. "He likes you, doesn't he?"


"Do you like him?"

Heero stroked Duo's hair, thinking. "He made me think of you. A lot. But he wasn't you."

Duo smiled. "Good answer, Heero."


*Now I know why he kept looking at me funny,* Nuriko thought absently, waiting for sleep to come. *A braid, purplish eyes... I must've made him think of Duo every time he looked at me.* He sighed, quietly. *They look good together...*

From across the room, Tasuki listened to Nuriko's sigh, feeling bad for his friend. Maybe he was only a bandit from Reikaku, but he wasn't completely clueless when it came to how other people were feeling. And he could tell that Nuriko had it bad for Heero.

Tasuki frowned, pondering. There had to be something he could do for Nuriko...

Then he grinned.


<blink> No idea where most of that came from. <shrug> Hope you liked, please give me feedback.