No, I have not fallen off the face of the earth (or whatever planet I happen to be living on at the moment). <g> I have been working on a couple of fics, the first of which is here. The other is still in process. And I really need to get back to the 3rd S&F sequel and... Well... You know what that's like. Anywho... Here, for your yaoi enjoyment, is "Inbound Telemarketing". Which has been a good balance for the OTHER fic. Thanks to Cutter for mentioning the topic.

Enjoy.

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Inbound Telemarketing
By LoneWolf
(kodoku na okami)
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COMMENTS: Cutter and I were emailing and the subjects of back rubs and phone sex services were mentioned in passing. Which led to this.

WARNINGS: yaoi, humor (within reason), heavy lime
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The phone rang.

If he'd been able to find any other job after the war...

The phone rang.

Well, he had actually, but he'd always ended up threatening to kill the wrong person, or getting bored and breaking into the wrong computer, or just quitting because he was tired of the same dull job every day.

The phone rang.

On this job, some of the people wanted to be threatened, and he was kept busy enough that he didn't have time to use the palm computer to hack anything, and while it was frequently wearing, it was never dull.

The phone rang.

Heero adjusted his headset and pressed the receive button on the palm computer. He put on his best sultry/bubbly tone, which wasn't very good, pitched his voice a little higher than normal and said, "Hello and thank you for calling the 'Hot Horny Hardcore Gay Asian Teen Boys Live Line'. My name is Yuji, and I'm your stud for this call. What would you like this afternoon?"

"Yuji? Nihonjin?"

Damn, that voice sounded familiar, but he couldn't quite place it. Well, whoever it was, they wanted a Japanese stud and Heero was definitely Japanese. "Aa. Nihonjin."

"Sugoi! One more thing, can I call you Heero?"

Alarms went off in Heero's head. How did this person know his name? And that "sugoi". he definitely knew it from somewhere.

"I'm really hot for this friend of mine, and his name is Heero."

Oh SHIT! It was Duo. Why in Hell was Duo calling the "Hot Horny Hardcore Gay Asian Teen Boys Live Line"? It was one thing for Heero to be working it. He didn't have to be gay to do that. Hell, he didn't even have to know exactly what he was talking about. He had scripts and other material that had come with his deluxe starter kit so he could put on a good act for the callers. But why in Hell would Duo call. Unless he knew Heero...

No. There was no way. The calls were delivered to the next available operator unless the caller dialed a specific extension, and Heero only had two regular callers, both of whom were fifty year old men going through a midlife crisis, playing their perverse little games over the phone, but too afraid -- or too smart -- to play them in real life. Which meant...

Oh, shit! Duo, gay? And hot for him? For him? Why the Hell would Duo be hot for him?

"Anou. Yuji? You still there?"

He was losing his train of thought. He needed to stay focussed on the call. "Aa. You can call me Heero." That was in the handbook. If the caller wanted to use a specific name, accept it. If you didn't they might think it was your real name. Heero definitely didn't want that -- especially on this call. "Tell me what this Heero is like." To be sure I'm not imagining things.

"He's a really nice guy, especially considering all the shit he's lived through. We were in the war together. At first I was just his friend, and I liked that a lot, but then I started noticing his body and realized I wanted to be more than just his friend. That weirded me out for a while, I was raised Catholic, y'know, so it took me a year or two to get over the whole gay thing. In the end, I decided, what the Hell, Heero's never gonna go for me, but I can always dream, and we can still be friends."

He'd had many different callers talking about much more explicit things, but being the real-life subject of this call made him far more uncomfortable than even the worst of those. Duo's confession fit one of his scripts, though, so he modified the next line to pick up where Duo had left off. "Dreaming wasn't enough?" Maybe he could get stay with a script. That would be easier to control.

"Hell, no. You should see him. He usually wears these Spandex biker shorts that show off his ass -- which is the most gorgeous ass you have ever seen, and we were roommates for a while, so I got to check out the uncovered article. It's even better in the flesh." He chuckled. "And his front's great too. He works out and keeps in shape. Lean, muscular, but not all bulgy, y'know. He's nicely hung..." He sighed. "God, I'd love touch his chest."

Heero was doubly glad that phone sex lines were legally limited to audio-only. He could feel a warm sensation creeping up his face and knew he was blushing. Or maybe it had something to do with the way his Spandex shorts were starting to feel tight in the crotch. "Aa. Why don't you, koi?"

"Oh God, do you know how badly I've wanted you to call me that, Heero?"

Duo was into the fantasy. The rest should be easy. Heero found his place in one of the scripts he'd memorized, making appropriate modifications as he went. "Oh, koi. I'm sitting here on my bed in nothing by my Spandex shorts, talking to you on the phone and the sound of your voice is making me so hot. I'm sliding my hand along my Spandex-clad leg, imagining it's--"

"Uh, Yuji?"

"You wanted to call me Heero."

"You're just reading a script, aren't you?"

Heero muttered an embarrassed, "Aa." He wasn't exactly reading, but it was a script.

"Just do what I tell you, Hee-koi, and let me hear you doing it. That's what I want."

This was definitely too strange. Heero shifted mental tracks to the "Oh Ah" script. "Okay, koi."

"So, I come into your room and find you laying on the bed, resting from a hard day's work. You're in your Spandex and green tank top. Laying on your back, one arm over your eyes. You hear me walk in, of course. You have good hearing. You wait as I walk over and sit on the bed next to you, a little annoyed that I've come over and interrupted your rest. Then I say, 'Heero, I love you.'"

The script didn't cover anything quite like this. None of them did. He'd just have to play along and see what happened. What would he really do if Duo walked in and said, "I love you"? "I move my arm from my face and look at you, frowning. 'Nani?'" He walked over to the bed and lay down. It would be easier to play the game if he was mimicking Duo's fantasy.

"I love you, Heero. I love you as my best friend, but... I want to be more than that. Can I touch you... please?"

Heero was silent for a moment, thinking. His first reaction would be shock followed by flat refusal -- or maybe a fist in Duo's belly. He'd never been touched that way before. But this was just a phone call, just a fantasy. Duo wouldn't actually be touching him. Besides, he wanted to know where Duo's little fantasy led. And how fast. "Aa." As he said it, he realized he'd have to touch himself to try to draw the reactions to satisfy Duo. He gritted his teeth. Ninmu ryoukai.

"I smile and lay my left hand on your belly, feeling the shallow ripples through the cloth."

Heero put his hand on his belly, imagining it was Duo's hand. It did feel nice. "That feels nice, koi. Your hand is warm." During the war, he and Duo had tended each other's wounds often enough that he knew Duo's hands were warmer than his.

"I rub gently, letting my fingers run along the ripples. between them."

Heero moved his hand, and was surprised to find he enjoyed the feeling. It tingled. He'd have never guessed that something so simple could be so pleasing, especially after all the theatrics some callers wanted. He wondered how much of his excitement was because he knew who was on the other end of the phone. "Nnnnn," he sighed. It was a slight exaggeration, but if it had been someone else's hand, instead of his own, Heero thought he might have "nnnnn-ed". He was damn close as it was.

"You look so tense, Hee-koi. Let me give you a nice back rub."

Ah. Now he's going for my ass. "Anou, I can't give myself a back rub," he said, breaking the story.

"Oh, could you get one of the other operators to do it?"

Duo dropped in and out of the fantasy easily. That was good. It meant he had it under control. "I work from home."

"Oh... Well. just imagine?"

"Aa." Heero had never had a good back rub, but that wasn't something he could say to a caller. Callers always expected their studs to be knowledgeable and very experienced, even when they wanted them to pretend to be inexperienced. Several of the scripts included short back rub scenes, though. Heero was sure he could pull it off. It was his mission.

Then he remembered something. "Just a second." He dashed over to his work desk and opened the toy drawer. He used most of the equipment from his starter kit purely for reference, but there were a couple of pieces like... Aha. "I have a hand-held massager." It *was* the *deluxe* starter kit.

"Sugoi! Thanks, Yuji."

"Heero." He lay back on the bed.

"Okay! Heero, I roll you over onto your belly, and ... I'm captivated by your ass. I whisper, 'You have such a beautiful ass.'"

Yes. As expected. Here we go. "You think so?"

"Hai. Definitely the most beautiful butt I've ever seen on man, woman, boy, girl or beast."

"I push myself up on the bed and..." He pushed up and began pulling off his tank top. It was harder to get out of it this way than he'd expected. "... struggle out of my tank top, tossing it onto the floor, then lay down again and say, 'Ready, koi.'"

"Mmmm. Hee-koi. You're making me hard. Your body is sooo gorgeous. I can see the muscles of your back rolling beneath the skin as you sink back onto the bed. I move to sit on your ass. It's nice and hard, like the rest of you. Like you're making me. And I lay my hands on your back, between the shoulders and... Oh shit! There's the boss. I gotta go. How can I be sure I get you next time?"

When they started, Heero hadn't been sure he wanted there to be a next time. Now, he really wanted to know where Duo was going next. He'd been certain Duo was about to rip off his shorts and begin the sexual part of the fantasy. Instead, Duo had acted like he was actually going to start the back rub. Oh, sure, he'd gotten a good look, but that was all. And in the time they'd spent on the phone, most callers would have done a Hell of a lot more than that. He dropped into script mode as he grabbed the palm computer from the bedside table and punched up the extension applet. "When you get the intro message, dial... 1221 ..." He entered "Duo -- Koi" next to the extension and tapped the button to assign it. "... and you'll get me -- or my voice mail if I'm busy. Voice mail isn't charged, so leave me a brief message and a pager number and I can page you when I'm free." That was more than he'd done for his other two regulars. "Oh, and I go off shift at 18:00."

"Damn. I'll have to call you again tomorrow. I'll do it during lunch, though. Think you could get some Spandex shorts by then?"

"Sure." Heero stifled the desire to laugh. If only you knew, Duo no hentai okama. "I'll try to keep lunch open for you, koi."

"Thanks." Then, voice fading as the phone moved toward the cradle, "Hello, Commander Ki--." Click.

Heero lay on his belly on the bed, thinking. So, Duo was horny for him. But it was more than that, wasn't it. Duo had made it clear that he'd started with something more complex than simple lust. He'd started with friendship. Well, they could still be friends, but Heero could never tell him about this or Duo would be mortified. Maybe he'd explore how Duo really felt next time.

The phone rang.

"Tanaka-sama," his headset whispered in his ear. Thursday. 16:34. Right on schedule. "Tanaka-sama" was one of his midlifers. Heero walked back to his work desk and...

The phone rang.

... pulled out a couple of magazines that had the kind of pictures and stories that Tanaka-sama liked to play. He began getting his...

The phone rang.

... thoughts together. Tanaka-sama was a VP at a pharmaceutical company. He left at 16:00 on Thursdays so he'd have extra time for his daily fix. His wife went to her bridge club on Thursdays. He liked...

The phone rang.

... to pretend he was "teaching" a fifteen-year-old, virgin bottom-boy. Heero felt he qualified on the virgin and boy parts, but none of the rest.

The phone rang.

"He. Hello?" Tanaka-sama liked him to pretend he didn't know who was calling.

"Yuji, my sweet boy."

"Oh, Tanaka-sama. I'm so glad it's you." Not really. "Some of the older boys at school were talking about something called sex and it scared me." Duo's call had been much more interesting that Tanaka-sama's was likely to be. But this call should take him to right before 18:00. That would leave him an hour before he was supposed to meet Relena for a movie and dinner. Just enough time.

"Just relax, Yuji, l'm standing beside you now, and I'll teach you everything you need to know."

"Oh, Tanaka-sama. You're so kind. I'm so small for my age." Tanaka-sama couldn't admit that he really wanted a twelve-year-old, but Heero had figured it out quickly enough. The man was such a pervert.

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"How was work?"

Heero looked up from his dessert -- Relena had insisted he try the cherries in creme over shortbread. It wasn't bad. He frowned faintly. He didn't like people asking him about work. "It was the usual grind." Maybe she'd drop it.

"What did you say you do again?"

He should have known better. She didn't know what "the usual grind" was -- even for people with normal jobs. But he had the answer for this one down. "Inbound telemarketing." It was the recommended response from the handbook. "People call me, not the other way around." It was true enough. Of course, the product hesold was time and fantasy, but each week his paycheck showed that he did it well. He was consistently one of the top ten operators on the service. "Would you like another cappuccino?" he asked, hoping to change the subject.

"Oh, no thanks. It'll keep me up all night." She smiled. "What did you think of the movie?"

"Hn. It was okay." He'd only half watched the movie, spending the time thinking about Duo's call and his job mostly. He found it interesting that he was so good at male-male phone sex, despite the fact that he was a poor conversationalist in real life, had never been attracted to guys . or anyone for that matter. He went out with Relena occasionally, but they were more friends than anything else. Hell, he'd never done more than masturbate -- usually when he was reviewing the magazines and videos that came with the starter kit, or the ones he'd acquired since to serve as "working material".

"Mm-hm. We should have seen something that didn't have so many bullets flying around."

"I like guns." Well, he did. He may not kill people anymore, but he enjoyed going to the gun range and firing off a few clips on target practice.

"Heero Yuy, you're hopeless." Relena chuckled softly. "Next thing you know you'll want to be a hit man for the Mafia."

He looked at her thoughtfully and she glanced away. That could be an interesting career move. Except. "I would join the Yakuza. And I said I liked guns, not killing." Threatening to kill someone. That was a different story. He sucked the last cherry into his mouth. A moment later, the smiled faintly as he pulled out the stem and examined the knot. He'd seen that in one of his movies and had been practicing off and on for weeks. He dropped it on the plate before him.

She smiled at him. "I'm glad," she said, apparently not noticing what he'd just done. Something told him he really didn't want Relena seeing that. She watched him as he toyed with the remains of the whipped cream and shortbread, casually concealing his little accomplishment. "Do you enjoy our little dates?" she asked.

His first impulse was to shrug. He knew better. Relena had just moved the conversation into deep water. "They're different."

Relena nodded. "Just friends, huh?"

There was no easy way out, so he chose to tell the truth bluntly. It was always the best choice. "Yes. I like being friends." He left unsaid that while she was beautiful, she just wasn't his type. He wasn't sure what his type was. He'd never really been attracted to anyone that way. Maybe something was wrong with him. Maybe Dr. J's manipulations had left him without a libido. No. He knew that wasn't true. He was about average in that department -- maybe a little above based on what he read in his magazines and saw on his videos.

"Oh well." She sighed. "I can live with that. I'm really too busy to try to have a boyfriend now anyway."

Heero could tell she was trying to make herself feel better about his rejection. "Relena." He caught her hand, and her eyes. "I like having you as a friend, especially now that we don't have all the war mess getting in the way, but." He shrugged. "I'm not going to lie to you and tell you I think we can be more. If I did, I wouldn't be your friend."

Relena stared at him. He could see she was a little hurt by his bluntness. "You never sugar-coat anything. I think that's part of what makes you Heero." He waited. "Okay, then. We'll be friends. But if you ever change your mind, let me know."

He nodded.

"Want to do this again sometime?"

"Aa." He nodded again.

"I pick the movie."

"No chick-flicks."

"No guns," she countered.

He let a small smile creep onto his lips. "The university anime club is running a 'Dirty Pair' marathon next week."

She laughed. "A chick-flick with guns. I'll check my calendar and give you a call."

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The phone rang for the fourth time.

"Hello. koi." He'd almost said, "Duo." That would have been a disaster. He quickly changed the entry on the palm computer, putting Duo's name last and well off to the side.

"Yuji. How'd you know it was me?"

He recited the standard line from the handbook. "The extensions I give out are individual to each caller who requests one. That lets me prepare for each special caller."

"How many special callers do you have?"

The handbook suggested he should answer that this caller was the only one, but Duo would have known it was a lie, so he'd opted for the truth. "Only three, counting you."

"You must be kinda new."

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, as good as you are, I'd think you'd have lots of regular callers."

"I've been doing this about six months. I'm selective about who I encourage." That was true. Tanaka-sama and Mr. Derrick, his midlifers, had been his first two callers and he'd practically pushed an extension on them because it was a sure way to make money. By the end of Mr. Derrick's call he'd realized that a lot of unpleasant people called phone sex lines. He had stopped offering extensions, relying on the normal load on the lines to keep his paycheck coming. Of course, he couldn't take back the midlifers' extensions, so he was stuck with those two particular perverts. He still found it odd that he didn't think of the handful of "plain gay" callers as perverts. His derision was reserved for the pedophiles like Tanaka-sama and Mr. Derrick, or the rapers who never wanted extensions because they never cared who they were phone raping. Or the killers. Some of those made even him nervous. Unfortunately, the perverts were the majority of the callers.

"Wow! Thanks for giving me an extension."

Heero chuckled. It was genuine. "Koi, you're the first caller who didn't have me naked and fucking in the first two minutes. I like that." That was reasonably accurate if he used his broader definition of "fucking" which included the more bizarre activities of some of the perverts. And he did like Duo's call, even if he wasn't sure where it was going.

"Oh, so I'm easy?"

"No. You're very challenging because you don't want me to act a script, you want the real thing. You must really care about this Heero guy." Now why the HELL had he said that?

"Yeah. I do." Heero could hear the grin in Duo's voice. "He's so beautiful. And I don't just mean his body. He's a great guy. Smart. Sensitive, though he usually hides it. Always wants to do things right. I think he'd do that in a relationship too. I really like being with him. But, he isn't really interested in me. I mean, maybe as a drinking buddy or something, but he's got a girlfriend."

"Nani?" Like Hell I do! Oh shit, stay in character. But I'm playing me, so where is the boundary between me and the character of me? Damn. This is challenging. Hn. Ninmu ryoukai.

"Yeah. I'm in love with a straight guy. Oh well, that's why I call you, so I can pretend for a while and let off a little steam."

He'd wanted to find out how Duo felt, but now the personal conversation was leaving him uncertain, because Duo was right. He'd never thought of Duo as much more than a drinking buddy. Now, he realized, they could be good friends if he'd let it happen. He wondered what that would be like. He would explore that next time, maybe, after he'd had a chance to think about it more. Now they had better move to the business of the call before he slipped and gave himself away. But he couldn't resist Duo's last comment. "So, did you let off a little steam last time?"

"Shit! No, you bastard. I was at work."

"Aa." Heero remembered.

"And I was so horny I couldn't stand up for half an hour."

"Gomen, koi." So, Duo had been that turned on just thinking about touching him.

"Nah. It's a chance I take by calling. And I called back, ne?"

He had called back. That made Heero feel good. "I think you were about to give me a back rub last time."

"Yeah. Did you get the Spandex shorts?"

"Of course. I have them on now."

"Really?"

"I give you my word, koi. And I have the massager ready."

"Okay, Heero."

Good. He was slipping into the fantasy now. The fantasy was safe. And Heero wanted know what happened next. "So, you turned me over on my belly on the bed, and I pushed up and took off my tank top--"

"Mmmm. Yes. You are so beautiful. As you lay back down on the bed, the muscles move across your back like waves on the ocean. And I sit on your lovely ass, feeling the hard muscle tensing there underneath me. I lean forward and lay my hands on your left shoulder."

"Nnn. They're nice and warm. That helps relax the tension in my shoulders."

"And I begin rubbing, slowly, firmly."

Heero turned the massager on low and warm and held it against his left shoulder. "Nnnn." Damn! That felt good. He moved it around slowly over his shoulder. "Aaaaahh."

"I push against the knots, feeling each muscle relax, getting looser. God, I'm getting hard again."

"I don't notice, though. That feels so good, koi. Keep rubbing."

"Of course, Heero. I want you to feel good." There was a pause as Duo sighed. "It feels so good to rub your back like this, Hee-koi."

"Why?" Heero was truly curious.

"Because I like touching you. It just makes me feel good. Now my hands move slowly across the space between your shoulder blades."

Heero moved the massager. "AAA! Koi! Stop right there between my shoulders."

"Whatever you want, Heero. I dig my fingers in deeper when I hit the tight spot on your spine at the base of your neck."

"Nnnn." He pressed the massager harder into the spot. "Oh, I can feel the muscles loosening up. Damn. I never realized I was so tense."

"This is the first time anyone's given you a back rub, ne, Yuji?"

It took a moment for Heero to register his phone name. "Aa. I'm not very experienced. Please don't stop."

"That's okay. I don't think Heero is either. Neither am I. Just a lot of reading and watching movies. Well, I keep my hands there, rubbing harder. Your muscles feel so sweet when they relax under my hands."

"Nnnn." Heero realized he was panting. Heero realized he had a raging hardon going. "Nnnnn." He didn't dare tell Duo. And it wouldn't fit the fantasy anyway. With Duo sitting on his ass giving him a backrub, there was no way Duo would know -- unless he told him. "Oh. That's good, koi. That feels so much better now." Damn if it didn't.

"I'm glad, Heero. I want you to enjoy this. I let my fingers work their way across to your right-- Damn! My lunch half-hour is almost over."

Damn is right, Heero thought. This was getting good. He could continue the massage on his own, of course, but it would be better to wait until Duo called back. It would make his reactions more real, and that was what Duo wanted. Realism. "I'm sorry, koi. I'm really enjoying this." A lot more than you know. "When can you call back?"

"You're off at 18:00 again, right?"

"Aa."

"Damn. Heero and I are going to the gym tomorrow morning."

Heero nodded. Duo's apartment complex had a great fitness center -- a damn sight better than the two exercise bikes and fifty pounds of dumbbells his apartment called a gym. He'd been meeting Duo every Saturday since Duo had moved into the place four months ago.

". and then I convinced him to go to the Maxfield Parrish exhibit with me."

Heero blinked. He'd forgotten about that. Good thing Duo had reminded him. "That's okay. I'm off weekends." He allowed himself a small smile. Duo didn't know he was reminding him. "Maybe you should offer him a back rub tomorrow after your workout." Oops. He needed to keep the line between his fantasies and Duo's firm. Especially now that he was finding parts of Duo's fantasy interesting.

Duo laughed. "Yeah. I can see it now. He'd glare at me and say, 'Omae o korosu.' Maybe some other time. I'll call back Monday. Bye."

But a back rub after their workout could be nice.

He thought about that later in the evening as he lay in bed. After letting off a lot of steam, he drifted into sleep, wondering if Duo had done the same.

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"Hnn." . It was funny . "Hnn." . Heero thought as he ... "Hnn." . looked in the mirror. . "Hnn." . He'd never seen ... "Hnn." . how Duo watched him. . "Hnn." . Especially when . "Hnn." . he was doing squats. . "Hnn." . Of course . "Hnn." . Duo was supposed . "Hnn." . to be watching . "Hnn." . because he was spotting, . "Hnn." . but now Heero saw . "Hnn." . how Duo's eyes . "Hnn." . followed every move . "Hnn." . with more than . "Hnn." . a spotter's interest . "Hnn." . which was obvious . "Hnn." . because his eyes . "Hnn." . followed Heero's ass . "Hnn." . not his back . "Hnnn." . as they should have . "Hnn." . to be sure . "Hnn." . he kept it straight . "Hnn." . but now, knowing . "Hnn." . it was obvious.

He lowered the barbell to the mat, pulled the towel from his waistband, and wiped the sweat from his forehead and chest. He usually wore his tank top when he was working out, but today he'd felt warm, so he'd taken it off. When he turned around, he noticed that it took a full three seconds for Duo's eyes to drag themselves up his body to his face.

"Anou, Heero. How can you squat a hundred kilos twenty-five reps every week and still have such skinny legs?"

Heero looked at the limbs in question. They were not skinny, just lean and long. He didn't like his thighs to touch when he walked, so he only did maintenance on them. "You don't like my legs?"

"You have great legs!"

The discussion had distracted Duo and Heero noticed he was staring at those "great legs". Damn! He hadn't expected that kind of reaction. Well, he had, but he'd expected Duo to stifle it or be more subtle about it.

Duo looked up, saw Heero watching him and turned ever so faintly pink. "Uh. I mean. They just don't look big enough for that kind of weight."

"I have dense muscles." Heero decided they'd both rather be talking about something else. "Do you want help resetting the bar?"

"Huh?"

"You did forty kilos last week. I don't think you're ready for a hundred yet." Duo's muscles were not as dense as his. "Forty is probably a good place for you to stay for a few weeks until you find your balance." Duo would look better if he never tried for a hundred. "No need to rush and get too big." Duo actually looked pretty good as he was.

They finished the workout an hour later. As they walked toward the locker room, Heero diverted into the steam room, kicking off his shoes before stepping through the door.

"Oi! Heero! We're supposed to be going to the art exhibit."

"The paintings aren't going anywhere. We can take a half hour for a good steam." He missed having a steam machine in the bathroom like he'd had while undercover at school in Japan. Running the water hot in his dinky bathroom only fogged the mirror, grew mildew, and run up his utility bill.

"But. But." Heero shucked off his Spandex shorts and jockstrap as one, bending at the waist as he stepped out of them, giving Duo a clear view of his ass all the way to the bottom. "Oh, fuck," Duo muttered.

Heero smirked faintly as he straightened, grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then picked up another towel, carefully schooling his face back to it's usual bland expression. He turned. "Here," he said, offering the towel to Duo, who looked at it, or possibly at Heero's not-entirely-concealed crotch, which was in line-of-sight with the towel in Heero's hand. Heero had positioned both towels very carefully.

Duo closed his eyes for a second, sighed, then opened them, looking at Heero's face, eyes suddenly twinkling. He grabbed the towel and walked over to the bench against the wall, where he proceeded to strip, folding shirt, shorts, jock, underwear and socks piece by piece as he removed them. Finally, after stacking them all a half dozen times to find the arrangement that suited him, he unfolded the towel and made quite a production of wrapping it around him so it didn't quite cover the bottom of his butt. "These towels aren't big enough, Heero." He folded it again and sat on it, naked, in the corner of the room, legs sprawled open before him.

Damn, he did that on purpose, Heero thought. He noticed that for all his antics, Duo wasn't hard and wondered how much will power that had taken. And Duo was right, the towels were small. They weren't really designed to cover a butt completely. And if Duo hadn't been with him, he wouldn't have bothered with the towel in the first place. Not willing to be outdone, Heero nodded. "They are," he agreed, removing his. He didn't bother putting it under him as he sat on the bench. Heero leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes, letting the hot steam relax his body.

"So, uh, Heero, what're you doing now?"

"Relaxing."

"No, baka. I mean your job."

Why the Hell did everyone want to know about his job? "Inbound telemarketing."

"Naaniiii?"

"Inbound telemarketing. People call me, not the other way around." Probably because he had so much trouble settling down after the war. Probably because he'd been through so many jobs in the past three and a half years. Probably because they were concerned. That thought made him relax more. It was good to know there were people who gave a damn about him.

"Oh. I know someone at work who did phone sex for a while when they were younger and that's what they called it."

Heero kept his voice carefully level. Better to ignore the comment. "I've been doing it for six months now." That was something of a record for him.

"Hey! That's great! So you think you've found a job you like?"

Heero shrugged. "It's okay. Some of the people I talk to are interesting. And some make me uncomfortable." He decided to steer for a safer subject again. "How about you? Still working for Noin?"

"Yep." Heero heard Duo lean back against the wall and sigh. "This is nice, Heero. I'm glad you dragged me in here."

"Hn." Heero was wondering why he kept having little flashbacks to Duo folding his clothes. What was so interesting about folding clothes? He gave up trying to understand and abandoned himself to the warm, wet embrace of the steam.

He thought a backrub would have been better, though.

--------------------

"Then we went to the art exhibit."

Heero shook his head. "So you spent the whole time in the steam room staring at him, koi?" Duo no hentai. He smiled faintly.

"I told you he's gorgeous, Yuji. But it wasn't like that. I was looking at him and, yeah, I was enjoying the view, but I was thinking about how much I liked just sitting there next to him and talking about stuff. I mean, maybe we can't be more than friends in real life, but I like being his friend. Hell, I didn't even get hard the whole time."

Yes, and how difficult was that? Still, Heero was pleased to discover that Duo had so much self-control. He'd been trying to provoke a reaction from him. "So you're happy with things the way they are?"

Duo sighed. "No, damn it, or I wouldn't be calling you. But I'd rather be his friend than not, so I'm not gonna push my luck. Besides, he doesn't have that many friends. He doesn't need to lose one just because I'd like to be more than a friend. I can live with things the way they are."

Damn! He was serious. "You're a damn great guy, koi." Damn great, Duo. I'll have to remember to be nicer to you. "So how was the art exhibit?"

"Good. But. Well. He kinda weirded me out. We went to see the Maxfield Parrish exhibit. After we were done, I went to buy a poster-print of 'Evening (Twilight)' and 'Aquamarine' to go with the print of 'Daybreak' that I already have. Anyway, he wandered off into the museum while I was in line and it was an hour later before I found him -- in the Cicely Mary Barker room--"

"She was the lady who painted the Flower Fairy pictures, ne?" Fairy, gay, Duo. He wondered why he hadn't made the connection at the time.

"Yeah. I like her work almost as much as Parrish's. Anyway, he was standing there, staring at 'The Willow Fairy' -- have you seen that one?"

"Aa."

"I watched him for twenty minutes. He looked so calm, so peaceful. You don't know how rare that is for him. He's beautiful all the time, but when he's like that. God. . I finally had to move because my calf was cramping and he heard me or saw me out of the corner of his eye, or maybe he's just psychic or something."

No, I heard you when you first walked in and listened to you breathing the whole time. "So? What happened?"

"I asked him if he liked the picture and... he said. he said she reminded him of me."

"And that was bad?"

Heero listened to silence for a moment, then heard a soft, shuddering sigh. "I thought for a second he was saying he thought I was beautiful. Then I decided it was because she was smiling, kinda like I do sometimes. I mean, he couldn't have meant it the other way, ne? He's straight."

Now it was Heero's turn to think. He remembered saying the words, but now he couldn't say how the girl had reminded him of Duo. Except that she shared more than his smile. . Her hair was almost Duo's color . And it was long, though not as long as his . And there was something of his easy movement in her pose . And his childlikeness as she dipped her foot into the water. And she was pretty to look at.

"I've seen that picture. You must be beautiful if he compared you to her. So then you went home?" . That was nice of me, and I didn't even think about it until after I'd said it. And isn't like I was stretching the truth because he is beautiful. . Shit. I think he's beautiful? But. Better move on.

"No. Then he really blew me away--"

"That sounds fun, koi." Heero wanted to kick himself as soon as he heard the words.

"Damn it, Yuji! I'm not baring my soul to you because I want you to make hentai jokes."

It was a line from a script. He'd found script lines creeping into his speech at odd and often inappropriate times lately -- especially when he was thinking and only half paying attention to a conversation. "Sorry, koi. It's a bad habit I've been picking up these last few months."

"S'okay, Yuji." Duo sighed again. "I guess being a phone sex operator isn't always fun and games, huh?"

"No, koi. There are some sick people out there."

"How do you know I'm not one of them?"

"That's easy, koi. We've talked for over an hour the past few days and you haven't asked me to be twelve. Or castrated me. Or raped me. Or made me beg to be fucked all the way by your meter-long dick even though I know it will kill me because--"

"Damn, Yuji. Why do you do this shit? Just hearing that makes me sick."

"It pays well. I had trouble keeping jobs before this one." It was the easy answer, but he wondered sometimes too. Maybe it was for the occasional caller like Duo who really wanted a person to talk to, instead a toy to play with. "Anyway, you were telling me how he surprised you."

"Uh. Yeah." Duo sighed. "The bastard invited me to dinner.

Bastard? Why the Hell am I a bastard for inviting you to dinner? "Why the Hell is he a bastard for inviting you to dinner?"

"Because, damn it, I was about to cream my jeans and desperately needed to go home and jack off and damn if he didn't ask me to dinner, which *really* almost made me cream my jeans."

"So you said no?" Why didn't you say no?

"Hell no! I said yes. We've had dinner together before, but I was always the one who asked. I. I felt like he really wanted to spend some time with me this time. It was like he'd asked me out on a date. No way I'd turn that down, even if I did risk sticky boxers. Even if I did know that wasn't what it really was."

Was it date? "Well, if he asked you, he probably did want to spend some time with you." Yes, it was a date. As much as his occasional dinners with Relena had been dates. And he had enjoyed it more, for some reason. Why?

"You think so? Wai! Maybe it was a date. Damn! You think I have a chance with him?"

Did Duo have a chance with him? If not, then why in Hell had he asked him to dinner? Maybe it was because Duo was fun, in his own, annoying way. Or was he trying to find the signs of affection that he'd missed before so he could say something about them? And if so, why? "Maybe. But you probably shouldn't rush him. He's probably trying to figure out what he wants." That was certainly the truth.

"Damn it, Yuji. I hate waiting."

"Well, right now I'm tired of waiting for more of my back rub, koi. Think you're up to it?" It was time to get into the fantasy. Duo was paying for the call, and while Heero had found he liked being Duo's confessor, they were on dangerous ground again, and he really did want more of the back rub -- even if it was just a hand-held massager in his hands and Duo's voice over the phone.

"Yeah. Heero."

"Okay. You were giving me a back rub, koi. And I was enjoying it, very much."

"Uh, yeah."

Heero waited a moment, then put the massager against his back. "Nnnnn. Your hands are so warm on my right shoulder. It feels so good."

"I knead the muscles in you shoulder, Heero. They're so tense. You're always so tense. But now I feel you relaxing. It makes me feel good too."

Why? "Anou. Why? . Aaaa."

"Because I want you to feel good, Hee-koi. I like making you feel good. I move down your back, slowly, working the muscles in the middle part of your back."

"Aaaaa! Damn, that feels incredible, koi!"

Duo chuckled. "You really never have had a back rub, Yuji?"

"Iie."

"Maybe I should come over and give you a real one."

"Nnnn. That would be nice, koi." Wait a minute. What the Hell am I saying? "But I thought you wanted Heero."

"Yeah, but maybe I should give up on him that way and look for someone else."

"And that would be me?"

"You're damn nice, Yuji."

Well, I wanted to be nice to him. So now he thinks I'm nice. Sort of. "How much do you really know about me?"

Silence, then, "Not much. But I'd like to know more. Maybe we should meet sometime."

"Maybe you should think about it for a while and learn who I am before you decide you love me." But you've already decided that, haven't you? About the real me, anyway.

"Okay. So tell me -- Damn! Gotta go back to work."

"Call me tomorrow?"

"You bet."

"And koi?"

"Yeah?"

"Tomorrow I want you to rub my belly again." Heero tapped the button on the palm computer's screen, dropping the connection before Duo could reply. That would give Duo something to think about. It certainly gave *him* something to think about. He rolled over on his back and laid his hand on his belly, feeling the muscle there -- and saw the bulge in his Spandex. That gave him more to think about.

--------------------

18:01.

Heero sighed as he pushed the buttons on the palm computer, switching the phone from the business line to his personal line. Tanaka-sama was starting to get more demanding. The man was into young boys because he was a size-freak. Today he'd started talking about various ways to make "[his] precious little Yuji" bigger. Heero had read about pumping. It was a little strange, but, hey, some guys just weren't satisfied with what genetics gave them. He figured it wasn't much different than competition body builders, or sumo wrestlers. But he wasn't sure he even wanted to research some of the other stuff Tanaka-sama had mentioned, much less play it over the phone.

It might be about time to start looking for a new job. Maybe he could find a phone sex line that catered to simpler tastes. He pushed the button for voice mail.

"Hello, Mr. Yuy? This is Rina Johnson from The Apartment Connection. I have information on a couple of units that seem to meet your criteria and I'd like to set up an appointment to show them to you. You can reach me at 4334-5613-2112. Or you can take a virtual tour at our site, www.apartments.com. The unit numbers are RG3878 and CC7943. Thanks."

Heero entered the phone number, the site and the apartment numbers into the palm computer. He'd do the virtual tour after he finished the rest of his voice mail. He'd taken this apartment because he could afford it when he was bouncing between jobs. Now that he'd found a something he could stick with -- maybe -- he could afford something better. Of course, he was going to miss hearing his neighbors' sex lives through the walls and ceiling. They had given him ideas he'd worked into the company's base scripts.

"Hello, Mr. Yuy. This is Mark Martinsen with WorldBanc. I'm pleased to be able to offer you our gold card with a low, (introductory) rate of 5.87%--"

Heero hit the delete button. He had two credit cards, and that was plenty. He'd recently paid them both off and intended to keep them that way.

"Heero, it's Duo. I just wanted to call and say thanks for Saturday. I had a great time and. uh. I was hoping we could do something like that again sometime. If that's okay with you, I mean. I don't want to be pushy or anything. Uh. Well. Anyway, give me a call when you get a chance. Bye."

Damn! Heero pushed the "envelope" button. The computer-generated voice recited, "Call received. today at. 14. 27." So, a couple of hours after their conversation. Damn. Duo had decided to take a chance, and Heero wasn't ready for it. He wasn't sure what he wanted.

"Hi, Heero. It's Relena. I just wanted to let you know that my calendar is free Friday night. I called the anime club at the university. The 'Dirty Pair' marathon starts at 20:00. Let's meet at the Greek restaurant across the street from the gym at 19:00."

Maybe he could talk to Relena about his dilemma. . Like Hell he could. He was better off pretending to be Yuji and talking to Duo about it. He sighed. Well, he was the one who'd suggested the date. He pressed the callback button and got Relena's voice mail. "Relena. Heero. 19:00 Friday."

Now, what to do about Duo.

He still wasn't sure.

Well. It could wait.

He pulled up the apartment site on the palm computer. Maybe after he was done with that he'd know what to do.

An hour later, he didn't know what to do about Duo, but he'd found the apartment he wanted, complete with an optional steam machine in the all-tile bathroom. He called Rina Johnson, expecting to get her voice mail. He preferred to do business over voice mail. Funny, considering the business he was in. He was surprised when she answered.

"Oh, this is my 'follow-me' number. I'm soaking in the tub right now."

That was certainly an interesting place to do business, Heero thought. Of course, he did some of his work in the bed. "I'll take RG3878 -- with a steam unit in the bathroom."

"That's great, Mr. Yuy. How soon do you want to move in?"

Heero thought for a moment. "As soon as I can get my business line moved? I work from home." Which, allowing for all the usual paperwork, should be about a month.

"How does Thursday sound?"

"Nani? What?"

"The unit is in a new complex that didn't pre-lease out before completion. It's basically waiting for you. You're in one of our apartments now, so Apartment Connection can handle the line transfer internally, and we can roll over your lease so you won't need a new deposit or two month's rent, just the difference for River Garden Courts' rates."

"Sugoi!" Damn. He was starting to sound like Duo.

"Just a couple of notes. The terms of the lease will change to reflect the new rent and some changes regarding pets, renters' association dues, and access to the gym, pool, and tennis courts, but they're all pretty normal. Oh, there's also a clause about the furniture. Basically if you stay in the same complex for three years you own your furniture. And I think that would include your steam machine."

"Ryoukai. Email me the documents and I'll have them back to you in the morning."

"Yes, sir." She was silent for a moment. "Just sent them. You should have them shortly. If you have any questions, please call me. You have my number. And I'll call you Tuesday to set up an appointment for our moving crew to transport your belongings on Thursday."

"Aa. Thanks, Rina." This was why he used this service. They handled everything. Except the packing. He looked around the bedroom and decided he could do that Tuesday and Wednesday evenings. That way he'd only have to miss one day of work.

--------------------

The call came later than usual.

"Hello, koi."

"Heero. I'm sitting on your delicious ass, rubbing your back. My hands are working their way down to the small of your back--"

So, he was jumping straight into the fantasy. That wasn't good. It said he was a bit out of control. "I turn over underneath you--"

"You try. No, Hee-koi. Let me rub your back."

"I want you to rub my front."

"Heero--"

"I'm stronger than you. I lift my ass and flip underneath you."

"What are you--"

"Rub my belly, koi. Please." Heero decided he was a bit out of control too. Well. It was too late now.

"I-- I--"

"Don't you want to? You feel me swelling beneath your ass."

"Oh, fuck, yes. I lay my hand on your belly, feeling the firm ripples of muscle there. Oh God, I've wanted to feel that for so long, Hee-koi."

"You did before, koi."

"You had your shirt on then. Now, your skin feels electric against my hand. I run my hands up and down over the ripples, like I did before, letting my fingers run into the valleys--"

"Nnnn. Koi, I didn't know."

"I move."

". I could feel so good."

". my hand ."

"You feel me getting harder under you."

"Naaniiii? . Oh fuck. . Yes, Heero. I trace my index fingers up the shallow line that runs from your abdomen to your breast bone and arc them out to circle your nipples."

"Aaaa! Koi, that's so . They're standing up beneath your fingers."

"I pinch them gently between my thumb and forefinger."

"Haaa. Haaa. Haaa."

"Harder."

"Oh fuck. Oh koi. More. Please."

"Harder. Watching your face soften with the pleasure."

"Yaaa! And a little pain, but-- Yaaa!"

"It's a good pain, ne, Yuji?"

"Yes, koi. I press up against your ass, harder than I was before. Oh, koi, this feels so good. Please. More."

"God, Yuji," Duo muttered. "You must be a virgin."

"I am, koi."

"Oh God. I take off my shirt."

"I reach up and grab your tits, squeezing them gently." Heero kept his hands on his own, though. It felt better than anything they'd done so far.

"Oh, yes! God, that's so good. I want you. I'll do anything for you."

"While you're running your mouth, koi, I unbutton and unzip your pants and slide my hand into your boxers."

"My dick is hard and wet. Ooohhh! Fuck! Yes! But I want more than your hand, Yuji. I climb off of you..."

"I keep my hand in your pants."

". And pull your shorts down ."

"I'm not wearing any underwear. My hard cock pops up. It's as wet as yours."

". then yank my pants off, pull the Astroglide out of my pocket and climb back on top of you."

"I lift my legs--"

"I push them back down. I want you inside me first, Yuji."

"I hold out my hand."

"I pour some lube on it, then on my hand. I begin rubbing your beautiful cock with it, watching it glisten."

"I roll the Astroglide on my fingers and slide one slowly into your ass."

"Ohhh. God! I push myself down on it, then pull back up. Give me another, please, Yuji."

"I hold out two fingers--"

The was a faint buzzing sound in the background, then, "Oh shit! SHIT! I gotta go. I'm ten minutes late already."

"Damn it, koi, I want to finish this. I want to fuck your ass."

"I'm sorry, Yuji. I wouldn't stop this close to, uh. well. but the boss can be a hardass about lunch breaks. Tomorrow? Please?"

Shit. "Of course." He sighed.

It wasn't until he'd finished the next call that Heero realized he'd meant it when he said he wanted to fuck Duo's ass. It was a couple of hours later before he realized Duo had been calling him Yuji.

--------------------

The phone rang.

Relena had called and left a message.

The phone rang.

A minor diplomatic crisis had come up in Eastern Europe. Some World Council member had opened his fat mouth and pissed off another representative and his people. They represented two groups that had been fighting each other for thousands of years over a few hectares of land. Their constituencies were protesting in the streets. Relena would be in Budapest for the next two weeks trying to stabilize the situation and make sure nothing happened in the aftermath.

The phone rang.

That was just as well as far as Heero was concerned. He had been hoping to find a way out of his date with her so he could make other plans. He'd finally decided how he wanted to answer Duo's message from yesterday.

The phone rang. The answering machine picked up. Heero had never figured out why Duo kept an answering machine when voice mail was only two credits a month. He waited for the inane sing-song message to play out. BEEEEP.

"Duo. Heero. I liked the Parrish exhibit. If you want to do another museum or something after the gym this week, that's--"

"Hello, Heero?"

"Duo? I thought you weren't home."

The screen lit up and Duo's face appeared. "Just got in the door. What were you saying?"

"I was wondering if you'd like to do something after the gym again this weekend. And Friday night there's a 'Dirty Pair' marathon at the university. I was wondering if you'd like to go."

There was silence. A very long silence. And a very worried look on Duo's face.

"Duo?"

"Uh, Heero. Can we meet somewhere in a few minutes?"

"I'm busy packing."

"Naaniiii?"

"I'm moving later this week. I'm packing."

"Oh... Well. I don't know how to say this, but. Damn. I had the hots for you, Heero."

"Nani?" Had?

"Yeah. I guess I'm gay. It-- it didn't start that way. I like being your friend but then I realized I wanted you sexually too y'know you are one beautiful guy and it was getting to be too much to handle so I called this phone sex line and I've been talking to this operator there for the past almost week and today. well I realized toward the end of the call that I was using his name not yours and Heero I still want to be your friend but I know I don't have a chance with you I mean you and Relena are quite an item. And. Uh. . . That's it, I guess."

What the Hell? He went out with Relena maybe once or twice a month. That did not constitute "an item". And, damn it, he'd finally figured out that Duo was beautiful, and he was attracted to Duo and he could handle it as long as Duo didn't get really kinky on him, and he didn't think Duo would and. Damn him if he wasn't in love with Yuji. . . Well, he could handle that. "Duo, I--"

"Look, Heero. I can understand if you don't want to hang around with me now. I'd like to go to the gym with you still, maybe other stuff sometimes, but we're just gonna be friends, I know. I think I'm gonna ask Yuji out tomorrow."

Heero felt his jaw drop. "You barely know this guy. What if he's some homicidal maniac?" Well, he had been at one time. Suicidal too.

Duo shrugged. "That's why I'm gonna ask him out. I want to get to know him better."

Heero stared at Duo's image on the screen for a full minute. When he finally spoke, his voice was calm again. "I don't have a problem with you being attracted to me, Duo. I've had other guys hit on me." That was true, and not just on the phone. "And I like having you as a friend. My new apartment complex has a gym, but I'd still like to work out with you on Saturday. And if this Yuji guy isn't what you expect." And I know he isn't. ". or even if he is, we canstill do something else after, if you'd like. You're still welcome to come to the 'Dirty Pair' marathon too. Hell, you can even bring Yuji." Yeah. That ought to be interesting.

"Thanks Heero. I'll see you at the gym." They watched each other for three heartbeats before Heero realized that the gym was all Duo was going to offer. Then Duo said, "I'm glad you don't think I'm weird or something. "

"You are weird, Duo. But not because you think I'm good looking." Heero smiled faintly. He had just come up with a better plan.

--------------------

"So you dumped him? Baka! You've been after him for how long now and he practically throws himself at you and you dumped him?"

"I wouldn't say he threw himself at me, Yuji. And like I said before, I'd rather be his friend than mess it up with something he can't deal with."

"Sounds like he dealt with it well enough to me, koi."

"Yeah. But would he have done as well if I'd walked into his apartment and we'd started doing what we did yesterday? I just don't want to mess up what we have."

Heero stifled a chuckle. I'd do better than you know, Duo. You weren't the only one about to cream yourself yesterday. "So what are you going to do now?"

"Like I said. I'm going to ask you out."

"Nani?" Not that he hadn't been expecting it. Duo had told him as much last night. And two minutes earlier as he'd recounted last night. Even so, hearing the actual words made it different -- made it real.

"Let's go to dinner tonight."

"Uh, koi. I may fuck on the first phone call, but--"

"Yuji no baka! Don't you know me better than that? I want to meet you and find out what you're really like. And if things work out, maybe in a few weeks or something we can talk about doing more. I'm not into casual relationships, in case you haven't figured that out. Hell, you don't know that much about me either."

"I can't go tonight. And I'm busy tomorrow. I'm moving into a new apartment."

"Great for you. Bad for me. I guess the phone sex is paying well?"

"Aa."

"What about Friday?"

"It's always too damn busy out on Friday night." It was time to put the plan in action. "Hey, why don't you come over to my place Thursday evening. Bring dinner and we'll have a little apartment warming party."

Silence. "Oooookay…"

"I'll probably be in the bedroom resting after a long day of unpacking when you get there. I'll leave the key under the mat."

"Yuji, you're not going to try to seduce me, are you?"

"Koi," Heero said disingenuously. "You seem to be too well grounded to be seduced that easily. I promise I'll have clothes on."

"Okay." Duo sighed.

"Sugoi! I'm moving into a new place called River Garden Courts."

"That's my complex! I just moved there a couple of months ago when it opened."

That's part of why I chose it. "Good. You know it. I'm in number 3878. Think you can find it?"

"Yeah. I should be there about 18:30. What about dinner?"

"Anything you like is fine. Oh, your lunch is almost over."

"Damn! And I was looking forward to getting you in my ass."

"Believe me, I'm looking forward to the same thing both ways. Maybe Friday afternoon." Or maybe Thursday night.

--------------------

It had been a long, hard day. The movers had shown up at 7:30 as he'd asked, and he'd been moving boxes and unpacking boxes and discarding boxes ever since. Getting his work desk organized had taken three hours. But, he was unpacked. It was 18:03, and he really was ready to lay down and rest for a few minutes. He adjusted the lights to half normal, flopped on his back on the bed and laid his arm across his face.

He must have dozed off, because the next thing he knew, someone was opening the door to the bedroom. Old instincts kicked in and were quickly quelled. It was 18:28. It was probably Duo.

"Yuji?"

Yes, it was Duo. Heero heard him walk into the room.

"Yuji? God, you look so much like Heero."

He waited as Duo sat on the side of the bed. Then waited two minutes more until Duo's hand landed gently on his belly, warm enough to feel it through the tank top. A little damp too, Heero decided. Sweaty palms. "Damn it, Yuji. You dressed like him. I thought you weren't going to try to seduce me."

Heero moved his arm from his face and looked at Duo. "I always dress like this at home. You were supposed to say, 'I love you, Heero'."

Duo's eyes bulged. "Oh shit! Heero! What are you doing here? Where's Yuji?" Somehow, Duo's eyes got even wider as his brain processed what Heero had said. He yanked his hand away from Heero's belly. "Oh fuck. Damn you, Heero. What are you doing working a gay phone sex line? Is this some kind of sick joke? "

Heero grabbed the hand and forced it back to his belly. "No. This isn't a joke, baka. I thought you wanted this. Now, my back is a little sore from all the moving. A back rub would be really nice."

Duo stared at him, mouth hanging open. He eventually coaxed it to form words. "You're serious?"

"To be honest, I'd like a Hell of a lot more than a back rub. But I know you don't like to rush and I have no practical experience with what that 'Hell of a lot more' is, so going slow for now sounds good to me."

He saw Duo grinning. "Well, Hee-koi. We may move a little faster than on the phone."

Heero nodded, then reached under the pillow and pulled out a tube. "But you can start with the back rub, ne?"

Duo took the tube from him. Read it. "BenGay?" He laughed. "Hell yes. Turn over."

--------------------

Heero woke with a faint headache. Damn, he thought, why was I drinking wine last night. Wine always made his head a little sore the next morning. Then he noticed the bed didn't feel right. He sat up and looked around. Whose apartment… Ah. Yesterday was Thursday. He'd moved into his new apartment. But what else had happened? This was why he rarely drank wine. A little too much and it messed up his brain's ability to move information from short-term memory to long-term memory.

What else was special about Thursday?

Oh. Shit! Duo had come over and… He dug deep. Yes. Duo had given him a real back rub. In the process Duo had told him about reading several books on erotic massage, but Heero couldn't remember much else except that it had felt sooo good. So good he'd had to take a quick shower afterwards because he'd literally creamed his Spandex.

Heero made a mental note to do laundry today.

He was pretty sure Duo had done that as a kind of revenge for the dinner after the museum. Or maybe for the teasing in the steam room. Or maybe some other temptation Heero had thrown his way. But, though it was mildly embarrassing when it happened, it had felt so fucking good, and Duo had seemed pleased that his reading had paid off. He remembered telling Duo… Yes. That was it. He'd told Duo he could give him a back rub any time.

Heero made another mental note to find the book on erotic massage that had come with his starter kit and read it. Turnabout was fair play.

He vaguely remembered coming out of the bathroom naked, hoping to surprise Duo, but Duo had gone to set out dinner. He was pretty sure he'd gotten dressed before walking out to the small dining room, and that was where everything disappeared into the haze of wine. What else had happened? He racked his brain, but couldn't find any more and it was… Damn! 08:45. He was on shift in fifteen minutes and wanted to get a shower and change and start the laundry.

He slid his legs out from under the sheet, sitting on the side of the bed, then stood, then sat back down. Oh. Shit. He was wearing a pair of Duo's boxers… and they were on backwards. What had happened last night? He stood and reached to pull the sheets off the bed for the laundry… and saw the other side of the bed was unmade. Oh. Fuck. He looked and, sure enough, there were long red-brown hairs on the pillow. They'd slept together. And he didn't remember a bit of it. It wasn't so much the sleeping together part that bothered him, it was not remembering his first time. Fucking shit!

He sighed. Well, it was too late now. And it was 08:50 and he needed to get the laundry set up. He pulled the sheets off the bed, piled his dirty clothes with them, quickly pulled on a clean pair of boxer-briefs and a tank-top… 08:55. Damn! The laundry would have to wait. He hurried to the kitchen, grabbed a couple of slices of toast and some cereal, spying the empty wine bottle on the table as he ate, then ran back to his room and the desk, grabbed the palm computer and his headset and punched up the business line ten seconds before 09:00.

He was still adjusting his headset when the first call came. A young gay guy wanting a quick, fifteen minute phone fuck. He recited the script and merged it with a couple of others, dragging the call out for a full forty-five minutes. He didn't feel guilty, though. The guy came twice. He got his money's worth. And Heero got clean sheets on the bed while doing it and the laundry moved to the washing machine.

Before he could put the laundry into the machine -- he didn't want to do that with the caller on the line, didn't want the guy to know he wasn't getting his full attention -- the phone rang again. "Mr. Derrick," the headset whispered. Damn. He must be off today or something. Heero pulled out his materials for the more violent of his two pedophiles and answered the phone.

--------------------

At 12:22, the phone rang. "Koi … Duo," the headset whispered. Oh shit. Well, here goes nothing. He punched the receive button. "Hello, koi."

"Do you mean that?"

"Hai. I mean that, Duo." He realized he'd been waiting, wondering if Duo would call, and was relieved he had.

"Sugoi!"

"I had a great time last night."

"Really?" For some reason, Duo sounded a bit skeptical.

"Yes. The backrub was… well, you know. But after, when we went to bed and we--"

"We what? Heero, you were out of it when I put you to bed. It was after midnight and I didn't feel like traipsing two miles across the complex to my apartment, so I stayed, but nothing happened."

"Oh." So, maybe he hadn't missed his first time. For some reason, that didn't feel as good as he thought it should.

"You don't remember any of it, do you?"

"Sorry. Too much wine does that to me." Then he remembered. "Wait a minute. If nothing happened, then how the Hell did I end up in your boxers."

Duo chuckled. "I wondered when you'd ask about that. You were out of it, but not unconscious. I guess too much wine does that to you too?"

"Aa."

"Anyway, when you saw me getting into bed, you wanted to know what boxers felt like and insisted I put a pair on you. I only had one pair." Heero heard the shrug in the brief pause. "I prefer to sleep naked anyway. … You don't mind that I'm wearing a pair of your boxer briefs right now, do you? The ones I bought you for Christmas last year with the little angels and devils all over them. They're not as uncomfortable as I thought they'd be."

"Baka." It didn't make sense, but it made him feel better to say it.

"You're the baka. Trying to con me into believing you remembered what happened last night."

"So, do you want me to pick up where we left off on Wednesday?"

"Hell no. At least, not right now. I don't have time. I called for two reasons. First, I want to know if you want to go to the 'Dirty Pair' marathon tonight."

Heero smiled to himself. "Hell yes. But no wine for me tonight."

"Of course not. I want you to remember tonight."

"Nani?"

"I'll pick you up at 18:30." Damn. Why did Duo want him to remember tonight? "Second reason. I found you a new job -- working with computers."

"Duo, the last two computer jobs I had I got in trouble for hacking their security."

"Ahhhh. But that's exactly why the Preventers want to hire you. We call it DIG for 'Digital Intelligence Gathering'. I spoke to Commander Killian. He says if you're half as good as I said you are you'll have no problem getting into the program. And you know I never lie, so you're in."

"Thanks, Duo."

"Not a problem. If we're going out together--"

"I hope we do a Hell of a lot more than that." And soon, damn it. "Go slow" could go to Hell. He wondered if this was how Duo had felt wanting him. If so, he felt truly sorry for him and was going to do his best to make up for it as soon as possible.

"-- I don't want my Hee-koi on the phone with a bunch of perverts."

"Aa. Like you, koi?"

Duo snickered. "Especially not perverts like me. You thought that back rub last night was hot. Heh. Wait until tonight."

"What about tonight?"

"Oops. Gotta go. Lunch is over." Click.

"Damn you, Duo," Heero muttered to the empty line. The bastard baka had planned that.

The phone rang.

--------------------

At 17:45, his palm computer bleeped an urgent email. He finished his call with Tanaka-sama and punched out of the operator pool at 17:58 -- two minutes early. Fuck 'em. He had another job waiting and a soon-to-be lover on the way.

The email was from Duo. "One problem with this new job. You won't be able to afford your steam machine. No problem. I'll move in and we'll split the rent. Oh. Damn. You only have one bed, and I prefer to sleep naked. I guess I'll just have to keep a few rubbers handy in case you can't control yourself."

Heero tapped the pad and dialed Duo's apartment, waited for the answering machine to pick up, said, "I'll help you pack tomorrow afternoon, koi. Now get your ass over here," and hung up. Tomorrow afternoon should give them plenty of time for other things tonight. He'd changed his mind about the 'Dirty Pair' marathon. They would be staying in tonight if he had anything to say about it.

Which reminded him of something Duo had said on Wednesday. Heero pulled open the toy drawer. He was sure he'd seen a bottle of Astroglide in there somewhere. He sorted through everything, finally finding it buried at the bottom with… He pulled out a strip of foil squares, counted off seven, then seven more, decided Duo might be a little lustier than his own "high-average" and added two more for safety.

He had just torn the sixteen condoms off the strip of fifty when the doorbell rang. 18:20. He ran to the door and peered through the peephole. Duo was early. That was okay. He was almost ready. He pulled of his tank-top and boxer-briefs and tossed them on the couch, draped the strip of condoms over his shoulder like a sash… then opened the door, grabbed Duo, yanked him into the apartment, closed the door, locked it, and pinned Duo against it with his body. "Hello, koi. Fuck the 'Dirty Pair' marathon." Heero waved the bottle of Astroglide at him.

Duo pushed him away gently, looked at him for a full two minutes, carefully surveying every inch of his naked body, and counting the condoms, twice. "Shit, Heero. Do you think you have enough?" he asked, pointing.

Heero frowned, concerned and just a bit confused. "Do we need more? I have more in the toy drawer."

Duo shivered. "Damn! How horny are you?"

"About average." Now Heero was really confused. "Maybe a little more."

"Heero, five or six is usually plenty."

"Aa. But I added one extra for me and then for you I--"

"Hee-koi, five or six is usually plenty for both… Oh. Fuck." Duo grinned, then laughed. "Y'know what you see in porn flicks and read in those magazines is way beyond what most people call 'average'."

"You mean that isn't real?" Heero looked upset as Duo shook his head. "Oh. I--"

Duo took the half step that put them against each other again and laid a hand on Heero's hip, sliding it around to gently squeeze his ass. "I have an idea. Instead of fucking the 'Dirty Pair' marathon, why don't you fuck me and we'll see just how 'average' you aren't?" Duo grabbed the bottle of Astroglide from Heero and opened it, spreading a few drops on his fingers.

"But… I… You-- AAAH!"

Duo poured on his innocent look. "What was that?" He caressed Heero again, drawing a "NnnnAAAH!", feeling Heero growing hard in his hand, relieved to discover Heero wasn't as above average in that department as he claimed to be in endurance.

"Hell yes," Heero muttered, grabbing him and pulling him toward the bedroom.

"Sugoi! And what's this toy drawer you mentioned?"

----------

<evil grin> I think Heero's "reference material" is about to be used for something other than just reference.

H: <looking tired> I'll say.
D: <looking blissful> But it was fun, ne?
H: After he ran down he insisted that I use the rest of the condom's I pulled off the strip -- and he'd only let me use one at a time.
D: Maybe I should dye your hair pink and call you my "Energizer Bunny".
H: <glares at Duo> Hn.
LW: Oh no. No more hair coloring.
D: <pouty look... then brightens> Oh well, I guess that means we have to find some other way to entertain ourselves. <looks meaningfully at Heero>
H: <worried look> Uh, Duo...
D: I was thinking about a cuddle on the couch in front of the TV, bunny-boy. You aren't the only one who's a little sore, y'know.
H: <small smile, with a hint of pride> Aa.