Title: Tenets of Fear
By Keelywolfe (keelywolfe@aol.com)
Rating: Lemon/ NC-17
Pairing: 2x?


Shedding the last of his clothes, Duo moved to kneel on the bed before his lover. The other boy didn't move, only watched him with shadowed eyes and Duo raised a hand to the boy's face to touch a soft cheek lightly. Studying his lover's nude form, he let his hand drift lower, down the slope of one shoulder, skimming the inside of an arm. The other boy remained perfectly still, allowed slim fingers to lightly circle his wrist.

Tracing the pulse point there with his thumb, Duo lifting the other boy's hand to his lips and kissed the sensitive skin inside his wrist lightly. His tongue flicked out to taste before moving upward, leaving a damp trail in his wake. Forcing himself to move slowly, ignoring the unabated rush of adrenaline from the battle earlier that day.

There was a slight inhalation when he kissed the juncture of the elbow and Duo paused, mischievous eyes meeting his lover's as he licked that spot again before resuming his journey.

Upward, to the shoulder, and Duo paused there, resting his cheek briefly against the warm skin, burying himself in the scent of his lover. And then he nipped the skin there lightly, teasingly, stealing away the intensity of the moment. Hiding the brief glimpse of his desperation behind the mask of his smile.

*Why do I let him do this?*

He nuzzled the boy's neck a bit roughly, sucking on the pale skin just long enough to leave a mark, laughing at his lover’s scowl. Kissing those pouting lips, Duo soothed away the annoyance, replacing it with dazed pleasure.

Nibbling down the line of his lover’s jaw, Duo found the shell of an ear, trace the soft curve with the tip of his tongue and smiled at his lover’s moan and the hands that caught at his shoulders, pulling him closer.

*Why do -I- do this?*

His fingertips glided down the smoothness of his lover’s chest, one finger brushing a nipple and Duo paused, investigating the tiny nub with curious fingers. It hardened under his touch, dragging a sigh of pleasure from the boy and Duo hushed it with another kiss, let his tongue slip past the hard edge of teeth and into the warm velvet of his lover’s mouth.

Hands drifted lower, brushing across the flatness of his lover’s belly and down to his lap, where the hardness there bloomed for him. The boy inhaled sharply as Duo clasped his cock in a loose fist. His other hand drifted lower, cupping the velvety sac beneath.

*I could have died today.*

Leaving the other boy's mouth, Duo kissed his way lower, down to that hardness where he lapped at the tip and tasted the salty bitterness that proved his lover’s need. He ran his tongue along the flared ridge of the head and the boy gasped, his hands flying to clutch at Duo’s long braid of hair.

Duo pulled back with a frown, ignoring his lover’s protests and freeing his braid, and he cast a glare at the boy. The mute appeal in his lover’s eyes made him grin and Duo drew his braid over his shoulder, petting it teasingly before he tugged the elastic from the end. The braid unraveled easily under his hands and Duo finger-combed it until it fell in gentle waves down his back.

*I may die tomorrow.*

The other boy leaned forward, eyes wide, drawn by the shining curtain of silk. Duo held very still, allowing his lover to hesitantly slide a hand, then two, into the length of his hair. Eyes drifting shut, Duo sighed contentedly at the impromptu scalp massage before the urgency of need reasserted itself and he tipped his lover backward onto the bed, tangling them both in the silken web of his hair.

*But right now I’m not dead. Right now I’m here, right here, with you.*

Lips met again and they kissed urgently, teasing forgotten in a wash of lust, in the need to prove again that this was real. Allowing the feel of heated skin and the scent of arousal chase away fears that neither of them would ever admit.

The boy drew his legs up, arching to rub his neglected erection against Duo’s stomach. Shifting, Duo manage to twist enough for their cocks to meet and they both gasped softly at the touch, a bright spark of pleasure in the dimness of their borrowed room.

*I’m not afraid of death.*

They rocked together briefly, sweat dampened skin clinging until Duo pulled away. His lover protested loudly this time, winding arms and legs around him and refusing to let go. Duo calmed him gently, moving only far enough to reach out with one arm and fumble in the drawer near the bed.

The tube of lubricant neatly slipped away from his groping fingertips and with a curse Duo finally pulled away from the other boy's grasp to retrieve it. He could have sworn he heard a muted snicker at that but he ignored it, far more important things on his mind, like pinning his lover to the mattress and fucking him within an inch of his life.

*I’m not afraid.*

He held the small tube aloft triumphantly and this time he was sure he heard a muffled laugh but a suspicious look at the boy's face only revealed calm blandness. Eyes narrowing, Duo crawled back over to the boy and kissed him bruisingly hard, until he noticed, with some satisfaction, that blandness was replaced again with hunger. There was no way in hell he was allowing his lover to be calm and cold in his bed. No way.

*But that’s a lie.*

Fumbling the tube open without releasing the other boy's mouth, Duo managed to slick the fingers of one hand. He nibbled lightly on the tip of his lover’s tongue as he found the entrance of his lover’s body, slipping one finger inside. Probing gently, deeply, until one finger was easily accepted and then he added another, catching his lover’s moans in his mouth.

Moans gave way to words, faintly pleading, and Duo smiled, pressing a last kiss to his lover’s parted lips before he removed his fingers. Sliding his hands beneath the other boy's hips, Duo tilted them upward, pushing his knees up until his lover’s calves were resting on his shoulders. Leaning forward, he pressed the head of his cock against the boy's entrance and paused, eyes closed as he savored that brief, perfect touch. And then he could wait no more and he pushed forward, into the tight heat of his lover’s body.

*It’s such a lie.*

He gasped raggedly, oh, he’d been wrong. -This- was perfection, this perfect, tight heat as he pressed deeper, engulfed in this wondrous, slick heat. His lover made a soft keening sound, perhaps of pain and Duo hesitated, shaking with the effort of remaining still when all he wanted to do was thrust forward, over and over into the haven of his lover’s body.


The boy whimpered, rocking upward in complaint against Duo’s stillness and Duo surged forward in relief, sighing as he was finally deep inside. He waited then, hips rocking very slightly in tiny circles as he waited. His lover protested as he always did, annoyance turning to anger and then to desperation as Duo refused to move. He writhed underneath Duo, trapped not by the young man’s body but by his own need.

*This I am afraid of.*

Duo’s hands were clenched in the sheets as he waited, still moving ever so slightly, finding a rhythm in his lover’s increasing loud curses. Until finally, finally, his lover surrendered, as he always did, the only thing he would surrender to, and he whispered, only barely audible.


And then Duo moved, pulling back and thrusting in hard, quickly, as his lover’s cries rose into the air. Frantic hands knotted painfully hard into Duo’s hair but he ignored it, driving in deeper, harder. One hand managed to release its death grip on the sheets and slipped between their bodies to his lover’s erection. A loud, warbling cry rose from the boy as he clasped it roughly, stroking in time to his deep lunges.

Close, so close, and Duo could feel drops of perspiration sliding down his cheeks as he moved, faster still until he was pounding into his lover. And he knew that the other boy was going to be sore as hell tomorrow, they didn’t have time to do this often enough for either of them to be accustomed to it but right now he didn’t care. Couldn’t care because it was so good, so tight and he thrust deeply, dragging a last cry from his lover, nearly a scream and hot fluid pulsed between them as his lover found his ecstasy, his heaven.

And then Duo fell over the edge of pleasure, muffling his own cries against the other boy's neck as he came, spilling himself deep inside his lover’s body and this was -real-, it was so real, this moment with no façade, no masks only heat and tightness and the sweetness of pleasure. Heaven.

And then it was over. They collapsed on the bed together, both of them sweaty and gasping for breath and Duo could have cried as he softened and slipped from the haven of his lover’s body. But he didn’t, wouldn’t, couldn’t. The moment was over, the veils had descended again and instead he raised his head enough to look at the boy's face, giving him a loud, sloppy kiss and a grin before he settled down, snuggling into his lover’s arms to sleep.

But the mask was still not quite in place, the veils still too thin, because as he drifted off, Duo whispered his lover’s name with just a touch too much warmth and soft contentment. Too much for a coupling of two soldiers after the heat of a battle and the other boy's eyes opened wide in startled bewilderment.

*I do fear death.*

The silence of the room was broken only by the soft rhythm of his lover’s breathing as he slept, undisturbed for this night by any dreams. Heero held him close, one hand idly stroking the silken length of Duo’s hair, still unbound. He caught a piece of it between his fingers and lifted it to his mouth, rubbing the silken lock over his lips as he considered. Never before in these encounters had Duo loosened his hair. Always it had remained braided, imprisoned away from curious fingers that had longed to touch.

*Because I fear this...and I fear you.*

But this time Duo had let it down. Had let him touch. Heero wondered, briefly, what it meant and then he dismissed it. It wasn't really important. Tightening his arms around his sleeping lover, Heero buried his face in that wondrous length of hair and inhaled deeply, once, twice, breathing in everything that was Duo even as he ignored the tiny voice in the back of his mind asking why he wanted to. Pulling back a bit, Heero rubbed his chest, trying to ease the strange tightness there before finally settling down to sleep.

He didn’t dream.