Ok I have lost my mind. I just couldn't get this out of my head til I wrote it. It's very silly!!! It has not been beta read, so it has mistakes galore. Hope it gives you a laugh!
dena

Hot Pants
By
Dena

/ You know what I say to your hot pants?
Say What?
Say get on down, ah ha ha…./

Duo narrowed his eyes in determination, if this didn’t get Heero’s attention he didn’t know what would. Duo took a last look at himself in the mirror and smiled at the image. His reflection revealed a slender, but sleekly muscled body in a black muscle t-shirt and skin-tight short leather black hot pants with strategic tears that gave glimpses of smooth silky flesh with honey brown locks cascading down around his body. Duo straightened his shoulders and sauntered out into the room and towards the boy at it’s center. Heero typed away on his computer, oblivious to the sexy vision trying to capture his attention.

/I’m in shippin’, if you’re receivin’
Cause what I see I ain’t believin’
The longest legs in the shortest pants
You got me doin’ a matin’ dance
Pant pant
You got me pantin’ like a dog
Pant pant
Ooo I’m a hot pants hot dog/

Duo glares at Heero as he is ignored by the object of his desire. A gentle knocking is heard at the door and Duo opens it to admit Quatre. “I’m going to the store, would you like anything?” Duo looks longingly at Heero one more time before going into the bathroom and checking out his hair supplies stored under the sink. Quatre moves to the bathroom door to talk with Duo, but can only gape as he is treated to the sight of Duo in VERY short hot pants bent over with the material drawn tight over his superb bottom. Quatre grins lustily and grabs Duo’s ass and gives it a good squeeze. “QUATRE?!” yelps Duo as he jerks around and stares dumbfounded at his friend. Duo begins to back away from the manic gleem in Quatre’s eyes as he closes in on Duo. Duo manages to evade Quatre’s groping hands as he is chased around the room, while the oblivious Heero continues to type on his computer. Duo trips Quatre and manages to escape the room, running down the hallway to hide in another room.

/You burned a hole in my mind
When I saw your cute behind
Wearin’ those hot pants
Hot hot hot hot pants, hot pants
Sizzlin’ hot hot pants
Hot hot hot hot pants, hot pants/

Duo listens at the door key-hole for any signs of pursuit, unaware of eyes hungrily devouring his form. Duo slowly, quietly backs away from the door…right into a waiting pair of arms. A band of steel wraps around Duo’s chest while a hand is busy fondling his firm butt cheek. Duo twists and wiggles until he slips free of the imprisoning arm and fondling hand. He feels his jaw hit the floor as he stares into Trowa’s impassioned eye. “I like your hot pants Duo.” Duo sweat-drops and begins to back towards the door, when the door flies open and Quatre enters the room. “Oh, Trowa…you found him…why don’t we share?” Duo takes one look at the advancing pair and dives out the window.

/Sap’s up spring’s on the rise
I’m bustin’ out my tank top tonight
Workin’ the night shift, I get off at three
Breakin’ out of the factory
Thunder tighs-hangin’ out
Moon beams, dancin’ about/

Duo lands in a bed of flowers and quickly gets up and runs into the back yard and leans up against the back of the house. Cautiously he peeks around the corner to see if he’s escaped his admirers. “Damn, these stupid hot pants didn’t work on the one they were supposed to work on!” Duo reaches down and unbuttons the shorts, getting ready to ditch them, when he hears a throaty purr in his ear. “Please continue, I’ll make it worth your while.” Duo again feels a hand on his butt, this time massaging a firm cheek. Wufei grins and wiggles his eyebrows at Duo causing him to faint. As Wufei reaches down to unzip the hot pants, Trowa and Quatre run around the corner of the house. All three boys pounce and the dust flies.

/If you would be so kind
Put on those hot pants and take a
Stroll through my mind
Hot pants explosion
At the factory
Baby it’s so sweet how you got me chokin’
Chokin’ on the sizzles you deliver in that
Outfit so smokin’
Hot pants flair up/

Duo silently slips out of the dust cloud and runs to a jeep and takes off for the town. It takes several minutes for Quatre, Trowa and Wufei to realize their quarry has escaped, then they are in hot pursuit. Meanwhile, Heero continues to type away on his computer in an oblivious manner. Duo reaches the town and heads for the mall, sure he can get lost in the crowd and buy some new pants!! “I’ll never wear hot pants again lord, just please get me out of this mess!” Duo pleaded. He dashed into the mall looking over his shoulder to make sure he had escaped his amorous team-mates.

/Ooo scintillatin’ sizzlin’ steamin’
Honey those hot pants got me screamin’
Supercalifragiwhata outfit you got on
Super vixen ooo foxy
Studball hunky baby rock me
Supercalihalitosos that outfit’s
The absolute mostest/

Duo walked through the mall looking for a store that had teenage clothing. He had to get out of these hot pants. Just as he was beginning to relax and feel safe….hands began to squeeze his butt. *Not again*. He balled up a fist and turned to strike….and froze in shock. Hilde and Relena stood behind him each with a hand on his buttocks. Duo took one look into the leering faces, screamed and ran. Relena and Hilde followed in close pursuit and were joined by Wufei, Quatre and Trowa. Duo ran for all he was worth, hoping to save his virtue from the lusting hoard behind him.

/Ooo I seen London and I seen France
But I never saw nothin’ so hot as you
In your hot pants
Sizzlin’ hot hot pants
Burning hot hot pants
Hot hot hot hot pants, hot pants/

Duo bent over gasping for breath. He had eluded the mob chasing him for the moment. He looked around fearfully before turning and running straight into someone. He looked up to apologized and turned white as a sheet as he realized he had run into Treize. Trieze had a decidedly lecherous look on his face as his arms closed around the struggling boy. “Zechs, look what I caught!” Zechs came up behind Duo sandwiching him between the two as their hands roamed over his bottom. “Mhmmm, hot pants, I like hot pants”, purred Treize. “Well if you let me got I’ll take them off for you.” Duo promised in a velvet tone of voice. Duo ran like hell as soon as the pair released him. As he ran from Treize and Zechs, the rest of his admirers saw him and joined the chase. Duo ran for the jeep and took off for the house…where weapons were stored!!

/Who says hot pants are dead and gone
wait’ll they see what you got on
Yeah I saw nothin’ so doggone hot
You belong in Ripley’s believe it or not
Here a hot, there a hot
Hot pants on a cute little butt yeah/

Duo reached the house and ran for the storage room just steps ahead of the mob that was after his virtue. He ran for the weapons door…and it was locked. He turned around and realized there was no escape. The lustful mob of friends and foes alike drew nearer. Meanwhile, Heero finished up his report and looked around the room…*wonder where everyone is?* Duo cowered in the corner of the room as the crowd drew closer. “Don’t worry Duo, you’ll enjoy this…really.” Quatre reached out a hand to grab the trembling boy. “Omae O Korouso!” Everyone froze at the deadly tone of voice. Body’s turned to look at the angry boy holding a bazooka on them. “Mine…so beat it!” Duo stared at the suddenly empty room. He smiled as he was yanked over Heero’s shoulder and carried to their shared bedroom, Heero’s hand roaming over his ass.

/I see the army the waves & the wacs yeah
Marchin’ down the railroad tracks in hot pants
Hot pants stretchin’ tight
Yeah hot pants clingin’ right
Hot pants, they’re getting’ so hot
We might have to take them off/

A very sated and sore Duo stretched in the bed. He turned to face his lover. “I though you didn’t notice how I looked in those hot pants.” “I noticed, but I had to finish my report.” “Oh, and Duo…you’d better not wear those hot pants for anyone but me!” Duo smiled as he was pounced again.

end