8-8-2002

All You Wanted
Author: Shinigami Maxwell aka Midnight Shadow
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me and neither does the song, All You Wanted, which is by Michelle Branch.

Pairings: None really. Just kind of a friendship thing between Heero and Duo.

Rating: G

Author's note: Obviously, this is a song fic. It just kinda came to me at like 5 in the morning. So please read and any comments are greatly appreciated. Also you might notice, for thoseof you who know the song, that the chorus is missing after the first time it is sung. I took them out because they all were the same thing and it made the fics flow badly. But I do know that there is more then one time which the chorus is sung. I hope nobody minds, and I'm sorry if someone does. It was necessary. Gomen Nasai. ^_^'

[...] Song lyrics
<....> Duo's thoughts
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[I wanted to be like you
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away]

Duo sighed as he sat laid in bed staring at the ceiling as his partner and room mate, Heero, sat typing away on his ever present laptop. Duo had met the Wing pilot not too long ago, and yet he felt he knew that there was something wrong with Heero. The braided boy was good at reading people, and every now and then Duo would see a longing deep in Heero's eyes. It lasted only seconds, but it told Duo of the sad story of the emptiness in Heero's heart. He knew that Heero was locked in a self-imposed emotional prison. Most would just think Heero was shy and just leave it at that, but after two months of brush offs and being ignored, Duo could tell that conversation and interaction with other people was not Heero's strong suit. Duo sighed again, and got up, deciding to go out for a while to think things out. There was a park in the middle of the campus, and it was a popular lunch gathering, but this late at night, the grounds were empty and the only sounds were those of the night as Duo silently made his way over to his favorite tree. Heero and Duo always ate lunch here. Well no, Heero always ate lunch here, Duo would just sit and talk, preferring to eat later in the day when there was more time. Leaning up against the old oak, he looked up at the stars through the branches. <Heero....> Duo thought. <Why are you so distant? What have you gone through?> Closing his eyes, he remembered. About a month before Duo had taken a peek into Heero's laptop while he was out and found files and files of stuff from Heero's past. Heero himself had not written these, it had been Doctor J. Most of the files were notes on how Heero was progressing in his experiaments, and as Duo read he learned that once upon a time Heero had been normal and *happy*. Doctor J and the war had taken that from Heero, and all he was now was a soldier who was empty inside. The experiments and the training had leached away at the young Heero and gave birth to the Heero that Duo knew today. If only Duo could give Heero his happiness back. At first Duo had envied the cold silent pilot, thinking that Heero could do anything and that he was strong enough to brush the horrors of war off. He thought Heero never felt all the pain that Duo always went through after battles and the nightmares that he suffered from, and Duo had wanted to be just like Heero. But one night after seeing that looking in Heero's eyes for the first time, he knew he was wrong.

[I didn't know that it was so cold
And you needed someone to show you the way
So I took your hand and we figured out
That when the tide comes I'd take you away]

Duo sat for a little longer, thinking of ways to help Heero. He acted so cold, but Duo knew he felt empty inside, and yet Duo didn't know how to help the blue eyed pilot. Once again he thought back, and remembered how it was on the streets, when Solo had found him. Duo was so quiet then. Years on the streets taught him to be wary of people he didn't know, which was everybody, but then came Solo. Solo offered his friendship and although Duo brushed him off continually and tried to ignore him, Solo kept trying and was always there. Everntually he broke through Duo's shell and Duo found a small piece of happiness. <Perhaps that's what Heero needs....>

[If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here]

<Yes...That's what he needs, he needs someone who cares...> And So Duo made up his mind. He would always be there for Heero. He knew now. Heero was empty because he was lonely, and Duo would try his best to be Heero's friend, no matter what. Duo would save Heero from the prison Heero had trapped himself in, the prison that had been built by J in his attemps to make the perfect soldier.

[So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted was somebody who cares]

He covered the loneliness very well, Duo came to realize as he walked back to the room. Always the soldier, Heero was always doing this or that. <Keeping busy, forgetting the empty place in his heart, forgetting that he is missing something....perhaps someone. I'll help you Heero. You won't be lonely as long as I can help it. I'll be there for you Heero, I'll be there.> And so Duo started on his mission to bring the old Heero back and give him his happiness again.

[I'm sinking slowly
So hurry hold me
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone]

Over the next few months, Duo continually gave Heero his friendship. It was a lot harder then Duo expected it to be. The road to happiness is a long and bumpy one, and Duo was learning that the hard way. Quite often Duo found himself depressed and thinking that his plans would never work, but he would tell himself that he had a mission and he would stick to it like Heero always stuck to his missions. Using Heero's example, Duo was able to keep to it, and eventually Duo found cracks in the "Perfect Soldier's" emotional wall. <Come on Heero, let me help you...>

[All you wanted was somebody who cares
If you need me you know I'll be there
Oh, yeah]

Soon, the other pilots noticed the slight change in Heero's demeanor, and while he was in no way talkative, it wasn't as hard to talk to Heero as it used to be. They noticed that Heero said more then his usual Hn, and this made living together during missions a lot easier, but Duo still saw those flashes of lonliness in Heero's eyes, and while they occured less and less often, Duo knew that Heero wasn't happy yet. Duo constantly wished that Heero would talk about his past, or at least share something of importance with him, but while Heero did talk, he didn't talk about himself, ever. But despite that, Duo wasn't going give up. <I will get through to you Heero. Someday.....>

[Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone]

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