Title: Finding Yourself
Authors: Sana and Sayuyuki, this part Sayuyuki
E-mails: smj@neobee.net (Sana) and mistress_sayu@hotmail.com (Sayuyuki)
Warnings: angst, AU, lemon, bastardized Relena
Pairings: 1x2, mention of 1xR
Disclaimer: We don't own them. We're just having fun!
Author's Notes: I'm posting this part for Sayu as she's not a member of this ML and, unfortunately, doesn't have time to join. We wanted to write a fic together for a while and we're having a lot of fun writing this, so I hope you'll enjoy reading it as well ^_^
Sana: The Bitter Taste of Tears www.geocities.com/sana1x2/
FFN under Sanashi
Wistful Eyes http://www.stormpages.com/wistfuleye/
A Jester's Mask at http://www.stormpages.com/deathangel02/main.html
Sayuyuki: Enter S.a.y.u. http://www.angelfire.com/gundam/sayu/
DHML fanfiction archive


A man sat in a room darkened with shadows, typing furiously on a black laptop. Every so often, he would curse loudly and effusively, then proceeded to delete everything he had just written. He repeated this process almost indefinitely, until a shrill, piercing voice interrupted his efforts.

"WHAT IS IT RELENA?!" He called angrily down the stairs to the source of the annoying voice, in a futile effort to quiet its incessantly whining sound.

"Why, Heero, darling, you needn't be so snippy...I just wanted to tell you that our dinner's ready." The blonde regally ascended the staircase to his private retreat, gliding softly, so that only the soft swish of her skirt betrayed her sudden presence beside him.

After noting his unresponsiveness, she tugged insistently on his arm, as a child of four or five might. "Heero...Heero! HEERO!" She called - at him - not to him. He sighed with impatience. Was this really supposed to be what marriage was like? Where was all the passion, the love, the supposed 'adoration'? He thought he'd made the right choice in marrying her...

Firmly shaking those thoughts aside, he stood up and pushed his chair in with a quiet sigh, finally giving in to her persistent efforts. He dug his bare feet into the soft, cushy carpeting, curled his toes in, and gave a small, soft sound of pleasure. He then began stretching slowly, loosening the muscles in his lower back and then pulled his legs taut, till they shrieked in protest. He had a physique to maintain, after all. Just because he was married didn't mean he could slack off...

"Heero?" His wife of three months ventured, after tiring of watching him stare at the far wall thoughtfully. He removed his inward gaze and smiled, slightly, the corners of his mouth barely turning up. His semi-long locks hung in his face, obscuring his striking blue eyes. With a sound of annoyance, he ran a hand through his unruly hair, brushing it back out behind his ears, for now at least.

"Well?" He replied, drolly, waiting for her imminent reply. Uncertainty showed clearly in her eyes, and a look of bafflement settled upon her easily readable countenance. I guess what they say about dumb blondes is true, he thought to himself with slight glee, taking small pleasure in the blank look on her face. His mood shifted suddenly as he was reminded of the fact that he was married to this despicable creature.

She pulled him unresistingly throughout the house to the dining area, and he pondered on how wrong he'd been about her. He'd thought it would be an adventure, that they could share everything...

Instead, she'd turned out to be a shallow creature, only interested in him for his looks and prominent family background. How foolish he'd been...

As he tuned himself back in, he became aware of her talking to him; no, that wasn't right, she was talking at him.

"So, Heero, how was your day? Work was absolutely awful today! This one woman at the embassy, can you believe it, insulted my French manicure! I mean, how could she possibly know anything about them? She was a third-rate aide for God's sake! "

He nodded silently in resignation, railing inside at how mundane the woman he'd shackled himself to was. He waited for her to ask the customary question, the one she's asked every day until she'd found out how much he abhorred that...Now she only asked every other day. It was a regular routine for her, and one for him as well, one he had to endure for the sake ofdomestic tranquility.

"So, Heero...When are you going to quit writing and get a real job? I know this great guy, over at the embassy... He really needs a new intern! He's second only to the Head Ambassador! You'd be third in line! Isn't that great, Heero? Think of the prestige, the fame! Think of how far you could climb the corporate ladder, with all your talent! Oh, please, Heero..."

"Relena," He admonished gently, seething inside, yet mocking her pathetic attempt at flattery.

At this gentle rebuke, she fell silent, waiting for the maid to come out with the plates.

"I have writer's block...Please, Relena, don't pressure me today..." He cut her off with that, just before she began some ceaseless chatter, just as the awaited plates were placed before them.

"Oh?" She asked archly, raising a brow. He could just see the wheels turning in her head, thinking of ways to manipulate him with that information...

He ate quickly, shoveling the food into his mouth with great gusto. Yes, whatever else she was, Relena was a great cook...But that's all, a nasty voice in the back of his head whispered. So what? He thought defiantly. I'm fine. The same voice just laughed, until Heero was done with dinner. He pushed his chair in and went back to his upstairs retreat...

He couldn't take much more of this. He had to get out, somehow.


Did you like it? Please send comments either to me, or to Sayu. If you send them to me, I'll make sure to forward them to her ^_^