remember - -= thoughts

Duo sighed to himself as himself as he stared at the beautiful boy at the computer. –Why can't I just tell him how I feel?- Duo wondered, -Maybe its cause I'm afraid that he'll hate me? What am I talking about of course that's the reason.- Duo sighed to himself once again then went back to his reading.

Heero, hearing the braided one's sigh, looked at Duo in the reflection of screen. –Why can't this damn war be over so I can tell him how I feel about him? Why don't I just tell him now? I know why, its cause I'm afraid that he will hate me after I tell him. Plus I'm supposed to be the perfect soldier, that means no emotions.-Heero thought to himself. He look at the reflection one more time then went back to work, only to notice that he couldn't keep his mind on his work. His mind, no matter how hard he tried not to let it, kept going back to the image of the braided angel on the bed.-Damn this!- Heero thought to himself and saved what he was working on

Duo noticing that Heero had stopped typing looked up and watched Heero as he turned off the computer, and stood up and stretched-God if only he knew how much he drives me crazy. If only he knew how much he needed to feel his body against his? How much he wanted to touch, kiss, and taste his body?-

"What are you looking at?"

Duo was startled out of his thoughts

"Uh.. Nothing just thinking? –If only I could tell you what it was that I was thinking!-"

"Hn! Well I'm going to bed."

"Oh,ok.." Duo got up off the bed and walked over to the dresser, opened up a couple of drawers and pulled out some close then walked to the bathroom. Never noticing that Heero was staring at him.

Heero watched as the beautiful pilot walked to the bathroom –Why is it that, that boy can make me feel this way? I wish there were some way to tell him that I need him? To tell him that just looking at him throws my whole system off course? To tell him that his endless chatter doesn't bother him as much as I tell him it does? To tell him that his smile is what keeps him going at times?-

The sound of the bathroom door opening broke into Heero's thoughts. As he watched Duo came out wearing a gray shirt and a pair of black boxers., his hair was not in its normal braid, but brushed out into a silken chestnut colored river.-God its amazing how much I want this long haired, violet eyed boy!-

Duo sensing that Heero was watching him-I wonder what he is thinking about. Probably a new way to try to kill himself!?!-

"Are you just going to stand there or are you getting into bed?"

"Hm.. Oh yeah, I am."

Duo gets in bed and lays there with his hands behind his head, staring at the ceiling.

If only Duo really knew what was going through the suicidal pilots head.-Oh Duo … If only you knew how I really felt about you, but that would be showing that this perfect soldier really does have emotions. To tell him how I feel would be revealing a weakness.-

"Night Heero," Duo said as he closed his eyes to go to sleep, hoping that someday he would be able to tell Heero how he feels.

"Night Duo," Heero said as he watched Duo fall asleep. Heero, not being able to sleep just laid there staring at the ceiling.

Duo was having trouble sleeping and it wasn't because of the boy beside him. He kept seeing blood and death.

Heero knew there was something wrong the minute he heard Duo mumble something then start tossing and turning. Heero knew exactly what was going on.-He's having those nightmares again. I better wake him up before he wakes up the hole house.- He grabs the sleeping pilot's shoulders and slowly beings to wake him up.

"Hey baka wake up! You're having a nightmare! Wake up Duo!"

Duo slowly starts to wake up, mumbling something about all the blood. After a few mints he opens his eyes to see a pair of cobalt blue eyes staring into his.-God you could get lost in those eyes!-

Heero could tell that Duo was finally waking up, now he just waited an watched as a pair of violet eyes open up.-His eyes are so deep. Its almost like you'll lose yourself in them. But yet its like he can see right into your soul and tell what you really feel. I wonder if he can tell how I feel about him. How I want to be able to stare into his eyes forever? How I want to feel his arms around me and his body against mine? How much I love him?-

As Duo was staring into Heero's eyes, he saw that his eyes were changing. He could see different emotions running through them, first it was confusion, then concern, net is was lust, then it was LOVE! At first he thought he was only imagining it, but upon second glance he saw that it was still there. –Could it be that he really loves me? Or is my mind playing a dirty trick on me? God I hope not! God I love him!!-

Heero who was still staring into Duo's eyes saw his eyes soften into something he never thought he would see in his eyes. He saw LOVE! - Could it be that Duo loves me? -

Duo could not believe what he was seeing. Before he knew what he was doing he had brought his hands up to touch his face. To his surprise Heero didn't push his hands away. But instead he turned his head kissed his thumb. The sight and feeling made him gasp then moan.

Heero was surprised at the feeling of Duo's soft skin on his face. He knew he should have just pushed his hands away, but for some reason he couldn't –This feels so good! - Then before he knew what he was doing he turned his head and kissed Duo's thumb The sound that came from Duo had a totally amazing effect on him. He had to hear it again, so this time he ran his tongue along the silky softness of his skin, bring forth-another moan from Duo. – Why am I doing this? It isn't right. But it feels so good. I shouldn't be doing this!- Heero pulled away from Duo and sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands.

Duo was surprised when Heero pulled away from him. –Was it something I did? - Duo wondered.

"Heero" Duo said "is something wrong? Please tell me. Was it something I did? Please tell me! I need to know!" Duo was trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill out.

Heero turned around to see Duo's eyes filled with pain and tears. –God I'm the one doing this to him. I'm the one causing him this pain!- Heero gently brushed away a tear that had fallen from Duo's eyes.

"Duo it was nothing you did. IT was me. I shouldn't have done that." Heero said quietly

"But why Heero? Tell me!"

"I don't know, I just can't explain it its to complicated you wouldn't understand it." Heero said

"Try me!"

"Duo why are you doing this", Heero groaned," can't you understand that I just can't tell you.

"Why Heero" Duo said with an angry tone, "can't you just tell me what the hell is wrong!"

"Damnit Duo I can't tell you because it would mean that this perfect soldier isn't so perfect after all," Heero yelled

Startled Duo asked, "What do you mean Heero?"

"It means that I have feelings for you Duo" Heero said softly.

"Oh Heero!" Duo said softly.

"But you need someone who is going to be with you forever. Not someone like me who is trying to find away to kill himself every chance he gets. You need someone who treats you better than I do. Someone who won't tell you shut up all the time. Some one who isn't always pulling on your braid. You need some one who is used to sharing what he feels. You need some one who can tell you that they love you with out having to worry about what might happen tomorrow." By the time Heero was done talking he was almost in tears.

"Oh Heero" Duo said softly "how long have you felt this way?"

"I'm not really sure, but I think it was when I first met you." "Wow" Duo said, "that long and you never told me until now"

"Well I was afraid of what you might say. And because I'm supposed to be the perfect soldier."

"Ok I can agree with the perfect soldier, but Heero why were you afraid to tell me?" Duo asked.

"I was scared that you would hate me," Heero said just above a whisper.

During this time Heero had turned his back on Duo, so he didn't see the smile appear on his face.

"Heero look at me." Heero turned around almost scared to look in Duo's eyes for fear of what he might see there. But when he saw the smile on Duo's face he puzzled. –What does this mean? -He wondered.

"Does it look like I hate you." Said Duo.

Heero finally looked into Duo's eyes and saw love shining there.

"Heero I have something I have to tell you. Its something I have wanted to tell you for a long time." Duo took a deep breath "Heero I love you!"

At first Heero didn't think he had heard right but after a few minutes it finally sunken in.-Duo loves me! - A smile slowly spread across his face.

Duo seeing the smile spread on Heero's face, started to get a goofy grin. But after every thing slowly sunk in, the smile softened and showed all his love for Heero.

Heero seeing this put his arms around Duo and pulls him close and gently brushes his lips against Duo's

Duo wanting more brought his hands up to run through Heero's hair to pull him closer and to deepen the kiss.

This brought a moan from Heero as he responded to Duo's actions. He felt Duo's tongue gently nudging his lips open. Heero wanting this more and more opened his mouth and was rocked by a wave of pleasure as he felt Duo's tongue slide along his.

After a couple of minutes they broke the kiss, both panting for breath neither one said anything as they stared into each other's eyes.

After they caught their breath they went back at the kiss. Only this time the kiss was filled with passion and love. There hands touched and explored each others body. They only broke the kiss to remove each other's clothes so that they could be closer together. The only sound that could be heard were moans of pleasure as hands, lips, and tongues caressed each other.

After a couple of hours the two lovers lay in bed together, neither saying anything, there hands loosely interlocked. After awhile Heero turned so that he could look into Duo's eyes. The love that he saw there took his breath away, -I don't deserve this. - Heero thought to himself, but he knew that he wouldn't be able to live if he didn't have Duo in his life. So Heero took a deep breath and said the four words that would change his life forever.

Looking deep into Duo's eye's he said "I love you Duo!'

Duo was grinning like a Cheshire cat as he said, "I love you too!"

 

THE END