6-5-2003

Surreal
Author: Miss Conception
Archive: Realm of Unsanity <http://tejinas.0catch.com>
Genre: lemon, PWP
Pairings: 1x1, 2x2, {2x1}
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: yaoi, lemon, PWP, mild angst, Duo POV, bad language, post EW

Disclaimer: I don't own them. I'm using them mercilessly but they love it, so it's okay, right?

Summary: Duo comes home from work early and catches Heero masturbating. The two roommates are about to become something more.

Dedication: To Jade, one of my favorite authors, who is the queen of lemony goodness. To everyone who replied to "The Guardian" so long ago, 'cause I feel bad that I have not written any more. Damn writer's block - To Bearilou, my lovely beta reader, who has been such a great help and inspiration to me. Don't feel so bad when you don't have time to read my fics. You know I love you no matter what!! *huggles*

Special thanks to DMx04 and Blue and Flawless for their super fast beta job!! You guys are awesome!! *huggles*

 

I bite my lip hoping it will help me keep quiet. God, I'm so hard, and my hand keeps pumping my shaft faster with each passing moment. If Heero finds me, I'm dead fuckin' meat. I watch intently as his left hand moves down to cup his balls, and the moan he lets out nearly drives me over the edge. His right hand is busy stroking his erection. It's the most erotic sight I've ever seen, and I'm close enough to climax that it takes only a few more strokes. I use every bit of willpower I have to keep from crying out as I shoot my release into my hand. I need to get away before Heero catches me.

I bolt to the bathroom to quickly clean up, thinking about how glad I am to have arrived home so early. I can hear his moans get even louder, and I'm sure he has to be reaching his climax by now. Just thinking about that makes my cock begin hardening again. I have to get out of the house, and quickly, too. I grab a washrag out of the closet and clean the cum off my stomach as quickly as possible. I walk back into the hallway and head toward the door, hoping Heero hasn't come out of his room yet.

I run into him in the hallway by our rooms. Literally. We nearly collide in my haste to get out, but he reaches his hand out to stop that. He pulls away rapidly and freezes for a moment afterward, obviously surprised to see me. I glance at him quickly and notice he is only wearing a pair of black boxers.

"Duo, when did you get home?" he asks me. Uh oh, I think he might suspect that I observed his little spectacle. I have to think of something quickly.

"Well - I just walked in the door. Why?" I know I sound nervous, but the look on Heero's face is making me jittery. He doesn't speak right away, and the look he's giving me is suspicious. I'm a damn pathetic liar, and I remember why I don't do it usually.

"How could you just be getting here? I didn't hear the door open. And besides, wouldn't you have been coming from that way?" he asks, pointing his arm in the opposite direction from where I just came.

Shit! I'm busted. I try again to think of a way to deny what I just saw, but no words come. Who knew there would come a day when THAT happened, that I, Duo Maxwell, would be speechless? I should have known that I could never fool the man that back in the war we called "perfect soldier".

"No answer, Duo?" he says when I don't respond.

I can't tell him that I have been fantasizing about him for months, thinking of what it would feel like to be blowing him, or what it would feel like to have his cock in my ass. Do I sound like I'm feeling suicidal?

"I bet you heard me jacking off, didn't you?"

My jaw drops. I never thought I would hear those kinds of words out of his mouth. This is not the Heero I've known and lived with for the three years since the war's been over. The Heero I know is quiet, unsure, maybe a little cold, and would definitely not talk about masturbation in front of me. This man in front of me, who is currently moving in even closer, is not the man I thought I knew. My breath catches as he moves in directly in front of me. His chest brushes against mine and I jump back.

"Cut it out, Heero!" I tell him, but I don't mean it. I just don't think I could tell him what I do mean.

"No," he tells me, and continues to move closer as I back away. Not surprisingly, my back hits the wall and I'm trapped. I don't want to get out, but I struggle anyway. This just seems too surreal. His arms move in and wrap around me, preventing me from flailing. His head moves in closer and his lips brush against my neck. I cry out, half in fear and half in desire. After so many years, it's scary to get this thing that I longed for but believed I could never have. I feel his tongue move against my neck and his hands run down my back to cup my ass. I writhe against him, trying to get him to let go. I can't do this right now. I need time to think about it.

"Stop, Heero." I request in a voice unlike my own. It's gentle and fearful, and obviously effective. He moves his head back to look at me with his piercing eyes, and drops his arms from around me. He moves back a few steps, his gaze still upon me. I see more emotion on his face right now than I ever have. He looks uncertain, and vulnerable in a way that I could never believe he would be. This is all happening too fast, and I take my opportunity and sprint out the door.

* * *

I don't know how long I run until I reach a park halfway across town. There's a fountain in the center of it and a bench beside the water. The bench is deserted, so I sit down in order to have a chance to gather my thoughts. I still don't understand what the hell is going on. I try to put the facts together.

One, Heero and I have been friends and roommates ever since the Mariemaia incident. Two, I realized soon after we moved in together that I was attracted to him. Three, I jacked off watching Heero jack off. Four, Heero caught me. Five, Heero was making moves on me. Six, I ran away from the thing I've wanted for the last three years. God, I'm such an idiot.

I ran away from Heero when he finally expressed some interest in me. My head sinks down into my hands as I shake it back and forth. I am a stupid fucking idiot. I've got to do something about it! I make up my mind about going back to apologize. I know how Heero is, and I know it must have taken all the courage he possessed to make a move on me. Some people think he must be fearless because he fought against the whole world and won. He's not. He's unsure, shy almost, when it comes to other people. He's never had affection in his whole life, and the closest thing he's had to a relationship is the few dates he had with Relena. Now I'm afraid I've destroyed what fragile courage he possessed when he made his bold move. I have to return before he decides to leave me.

I run home quickly, but it seems to take much longer than it took to run away. As I approach the house, my heart begins to beat very rapidly. His car is in the driveway, which means he's probably still home. I mean it's not like I was gone for that long. I glance at my watch: nearly an hour has passed. I pull out my keys hurriedly and walk in the door. "Heero?" I call out softly as I enter.

I hear nothing, so I walk toward the kitchen. I notice a note on the table. I dash to it quickly and begin reading.

"Duo,

Got called in to work for a few days. Sorry about earlier.

Heero"

It's just like Heero to make brief explanations. I don't know if this can wait for the few days it will take for him to return. I dial the Preventers and Wufei answers.

"Yo, Wufei, has Heero left?" I ask, trying to keep all the nervousness I feel out of my voice and off my face.

"About ten minutes ago, Duo. Is it important? I can try to connect you to his mobile." Wufei offers. He must sense my anxiety. Then again, he's one of the four men in the world that know me best.

A dreadful sense of defeat washes over me as I realize this was EXACTLY what I didn't want to happen. I will have to wait until he gets back. I don't know what I was hoping to solve with a phone call, since I really want to talk him in person. "No thanks, Wufei. I'll just tell him when he gets back. I'll see you there tomorrow, right? Want to do lunch?"

"Sure, Maxwell, just stop by after you get in. Later." He salutes as he ends the call.

Shit. What the fuck am I going to do for the next three or four days?

***

Work and eat. That's what I do for the next three days. I spend as much time as I can at work, catching up on all my late paperwork from the last few cases. I can barely concentrate, but I do as much as I can to stay focused. I think I stun both Wufei and Lady Une as I sit at my desk and go to town with reports. Wufei notices something is up on the first day and confronts me about it when we go to lunch.

We sit down in the cafeteria on the third floor of the Preventer building with food in our hands. I've barely said a word so far, which is not normal for me. "Okay, Maxwell," Wufei begins, and I brace myself. "You're acting funny."

I force out a laugh and shake my head. "Nah, I just realized how far behind I am on all my paperwork. You know, I still haven't finished that report from the Truman-Delphi case from over a month ago. Lady Une is about to tan my hide, I'm sure! It's a damn important case, and the court proceedings are set to begin next week."

Luckily for me, he doesn't push it. It wouldn't be like Wufei to do so. He's not exactly the probing type, and he is big on letting people have their privacy. He gives me one final disbelieving look and concentrates on eating his lunch. He doesn't broach the subject again, but I feel the question burning in his eyes every time he sees me.

I spend over twelve hours a day at work for the next few days, and I am amazed with how much I am able to finish. By that day I am caught up, and I glance at the clock. It's after eight o'clock in the evening, and I decide it's time for me to head home. Everyone else has long since left for the day. I quickly gather all of my belongings and head toward the elevator. I hit the 'down' button and wait for the car to arrive. I hear the 'ding' and get ready to step in, and run straight into another body. The word "shit" flies out of my mouth before I have time to stop it, and I am forced to take a few steps backward.

After a few seconds I regain my composure and look up, ready to apologize for being careless. Somehow, I'm not really surprised to see Heero standing in front of me with an unreadable expression on his face. "Sorry, Heero, I didn't see you step out." I tell him. It seems like the best thing to say, and I hope to God I've managed to keep all hints of the anxiety I feel out of my voice.

He shrugs and tries to move past me. I put my hand out to stop him, grabbing on to his shoulder. I know I fucked up before, but no way am I going to just let him walk away and pretend that nothing happened. I know Heero, and if I let him go now I'll never know exactly what he wants from me. I have to do this now. I take a deep breath and begin. "Wait."

He turns around to face me. "Yes?" he asks. All traces of his usual nonchalant mask are gone and the great apprehension he feels is obvious in his posture and expression.

I only have one chance to make this right. I wrap my arms around his tense body and pull him close. "I'm sorry," I tell him softly as I bury my face in the crook of his neck. "I do want you. I was just scared. Scared of getting what I wanted. I've wanted you forever, you know. Back in the war it was all I could think of to -" He cuts me off with his mouth.

Our first kiss is fierce and leaves me breathless. I pull him even closer. The movement surprises him and he gasps, opening his mouth a tiny bit. I use the opportunity to slip my tongue into his mouth. He tastes unique, tangy; I've never tasted anything like it. Our tongues dance together in smooth motions, as if we've both been doing this forever. His hands slide up my back and tangle in my hair. His mouth is firm, and his kisses set me on fire.

Soon, kissing his mouth is no longer enough. My hands move to unbutton his shirt, and soon I pull it off and move my mouth down his neck. I slide my leg between his and brush my thigh against his erection. He moans softly, and I slide my hands down to cup his ass.

"Duo.." he calls out my name in a harsh, lust-filled voice. My mouth moves downward to his left nipple first. I curl my tongue around it before lightly grazing it with my teeth. He arches into the touch, and I move my mouth to his right nipple. I repeat the action, and he bucks against me again.

In a few moments of time, his back and my hands brush up against the wall. My mouth moves to his belly button, and I dip my tongue inside the small hole. He gasps as I do so. I look up into his eyes, glazed over with passion. I make sure he knows what want to do next. My hands on his ass slide forward and move to unzip and unbutton his pants. The look on his face urges me on, and my hands brush up against his erection. His neck arches back and he moans again. He's more than ready for what I want to do to him.

In one swift motion, I'm on my knees, his pants are down and his cock is in my mouth. He's rock hard, and I nearly gag as I suck down as much of him as I can in that first motion. His hands pull my hair and he pants my name throatily. His excited actions urge me, and I let his length slide slowly out of my mouth. Just before the tip is out I suck it back in again swiftly. I repeat this a few times before I pull my mouth back and take him into my hands, jerking him off. God, this is better than my best fantasies. I move my hands and run my tongue up and down his cock a few times before he thrusts it back into my mouth. I suck as best as I can and move one hand inside my pants to grasp my own erection. It's not long before he calls out a brief warning and climaxes in my mouth. I suck down as much of his essence as I can, but I'm coming as well. His sperm mixed with some of my saliva rolls down my chin and I cum all over my hand. It's all over, and his body sinks down the wall and he sits on the floor in front of me.

A few moments pass before we are able to catch our breath, and he speaks first. "That was..." He can't seem to find the words to express what he's feeling. I can sympathize.

"I know," I assure him before gently kissing him. I pull back quickly and look him straight in the eyes. "What now?" I ask tentatively. I want to make sure this isn't a one-time thing.

He smiles, one of his rare and beautiful ones. "Well, how about we go home, shower, sleep, and see where tomorrow takes us?"

I smile back at him. It sounds like a good suggestion to me, so long as I get some good action before bedtime, that is. I stand up quickly and help him up. I have a feeling this one-day-at-a-time thing could be just what both of us need. That surreal feeling finally leaves, and I'm content to know I am really going to get a chance with my fantasy man. I've never been happier as I follow him out to my car and head home.

~ Fin