Jungle love part 14
Contents: YAOI, sap, HET hints, AU, OC, possible humor?

Pairings: 1xOC, 1x2 overall

Disclaimer: I do not own GW or its characters

Warnings: bad grammar spoken, swearing, nudity, some graphical bloodshed, maybe slight Geographic error

Rated: NC-17

Notes- Do NOT let the HET scare you away! It's very minor!

More Notes: I actually did research for this part! O_O Please try not to be too picky about location and land area and range and mountains, etc. Just sit back and enjoy!

(Deleted the word meanings cause… it's getting too long. But if I have a new word to decipher, then I'll put it up. Or whatever words are in the chapter will be put up here.)
Sop- means what?
Ninga- means idiot

To say he was annoyed would be an understatement. To say he was pissed off would be a miracle. He was seeing red, and it wasn't from the spray. Luckily, he never got hit in the eyes. He slashed the scythe back and forth like a mad man, going ballistic on anything in his path! Unfortunately, the skunk already took off before he swung his weapon.

"You little shit! I'll get you for that!!" Now he wasn't one bit sorry for the black and white mammal. He was going to kill it without mercy and present it to the chief on a silver platter!

At first, he thought he lost the skunk. But out of the corner of his eye, he saw the black-stripped tail disappear around a bush. In a fury, he leapt after the creature, scythe held in both hands and blade forward in a fighting stance. He ran through the bushes, turned the corner just as he saw the thing turn. He couldn't stop himself, and he went right through a briar patch.

The thorns on the suckers were huge! They left scratches on his exposed arms, legs, stomach, and chest as he rushed into the patch. His screams were heard from all around, but didn't travel far enough to reach the sensitive ears of his lover, who was in his hut at the moment, talking with Anana.

Duo had no clue to where the thing hid, but now he was stuck in the middle of the briar patch, with three huge thorns sticking out of him. He took the time to pull one out of his thigh, one out of his arm, and the other one out of his butt.

"That is gonna leave a mark!" Duo sighed. He surveyed the area, and spotted the little critter in a cubbyhole surrounded by branches with huge thorns. "I see you hiding…" he chuckled, "You are NOT going to get away with spraying me!" His eyes traveled up to the blade on his weapon. He grinned wickedly, "This patch won't stop me like you think."

He began to swing the scythe forward, and he sliced through the briar patch like they were dead twigs. The skunk couldn't go anywhere. Duo had it trapped. "Any last requests?" he eyed the skunk. "No? Alright then… here's for stinking me up!" and with one smooth slash, he cut the skunks head off.

"Mission complete."


Duo walked sluggishly back to the village, dead skunk in hand and pungent odor all around. The villagers that were outside tending gardens and making clay pots stopped to ogle the young English man. As he passed them by, they all held their noses or made a face. Duo didn't care, he was happy to have completed his task. He got to the chief's hut and was escorted in right away.

Trowa was there, knowing that he was to be needed when Duo came back. When Duo entered, Trowa made an `eww' noise and held his nose.

"Well? What did you expect?" Duo glared, "I had to hunt skunk."

The chief, however, didn't seem to care. He had a big smile on his face at the sight of Duo, bloody and stinky. The chief congratulated Duo on a job well done, and asked Trowa to have Heero help him skin the animal. Trowa cringed, feeling sorry for his native friend, and then told Duo what he had to do. They left the hut, leaving behind the skunk odor and fainted guards.


Trowa peered into Heero's hut, making sure that he was decent. Anana was there, talking to him about something. Heero had a powerful sense of smell, and before Duo even walked in, he knew that Duo had been successful.

In their native tongue, Trowa explained things to Heero about helping Duo skin the skunk. Heero didn't look too pleased about it, but he knew it had to be done.

Duo finally wandered in. He smiled coyly at his husband and held up the dead creature. "I did it."

"I see." Heero grumbled, holding his nose while he still could. Duo chuckled.

"Something wrong, Heero?" he fluttered his lashes.

"Ninga." Heero growled. He picked up his skinning knife to help Duo do his job. This was one animal that he really hated skinning.

It wasn't long, and Heero and Duo had the animal totally furless. Heero tanned the hide the best he could, and they both walked outside to fling the dead skunk as far way from the village as they could.

"Finally!" Duo smiled. They both walked back to the village in a strange silence. The longhaired man was about to take Heero's hand in his when Heero moved away and said,

"You… um… need ta warsh…"

Duo's eyes fell, "Oh. Sorry, Heero."

"Still love Duo." Heero said reassuringly, "B-but dun want to smell."

"I understand, really! I love you too, by the way." He gave Heero a toothy grin.

"Ninga." Heero shook his head, but he was smiling.


Once the skunk fur was done drying, Duo brought it to the chief to present to him. Trowa was there to translate, of course, and told Duo he got the chief's blessing and that now his punishment was two weeks instead of a month.

"Yes! Tell the chief thanks!"

Trowa smiled, looking at the chief, "Duo roum nalv dai."

Chief Alem nodded, eyes pleased.

"So," Duo patted Trowa on the back, "How long did you say you were staying here?"

"As long as it takes. Why?"

"I was wondering… would you be able to stay with me and help me raise Heero's kid? Teach English and stuff?" he gave Trowa that `pretty, pretty please?' look, bottom lip protruding as well.

"I don't know yet. We'll have to see what's in store for me, and what I decide to do. I haven't the foggiest on what I want yet."

"Ok. Take your time, pal. It's just that I have a feeling I won't be able to learn all of their language, and I may need some help with things here… ya know."

"I figured as much." Trowa sighed, "If anything, I could just stay here until Heero really knows English."

"Well, I suppose it's your call. I don't want to tell you what to do, but I really hope that you stay."

"We'll see, Duo." Inside, Trowa was joyful. "We'll see."


Later that night, they had a small celebration in Duo's honor. The chief decided to hold it for the longhaired Englishman, and help him to get the smell off of him. It was the first time Duo got to meet their witch doctor, who looked like he was in his 20's. His real age was unknown. Some say he is almost one hundred.

"This is their witch doctor, Akuji.[1] He has a special type of cream that he makes that will get rid of skunk smell." Trowa explained.

"That's great!" Duo beamed.

"Unfortunately, you have to be naked."

"What's unfortunate about that?"

"He has to smear the stuff on you… all of you."

Duo's eyes widened to unimaginable proportions.

"Don't worry, Duo. It's not sexual. And Heero DOES understand this. Besides," Trowa smirked, "You're getting unbearable to be around."

Duo glared, "Gee, thanks pal. I thought maybe I'd get more support from you…"

"Unless you WANT to smell like skunk for a long time…"

"Alright already! I suppose getting naked isn't that bad."

"Remember, Duo… you have to get naked for that test to save Heero's child… if it's a girl."

"You talked to the chief?"

"No. You, Heero, and me have to do it together. Heero has to be there to ok it, and I have to be there…"

"To translate it," Duo finished, "I know." He looked up at the witch doctor who had been silently watching the two English men talk. He seemed to be enjoying watching them, and his gaze gave Duo goose bumps.

He looked like the traditional Witch Doctor- a big wild headdress, face paint, colorful skirt thing, ankle and wrist bracelets, and very skinny. He was holding something in his hands, some kind of clay pot that was decorated rather fancy. Inside the pot were some greenish-gray looking glob and an ancient paintbrush made out of either human or animal hair.

"Akuji, right?" he smiled. The witch doctor nodded, lifting up the man-made brush with goop at the end of it. He looked over at Trowa as if he was asking, `why isn't he nude yet?'

"Duo…" Trowa said, looking over at his longhaired friend.

"Oh, yeah… gotta strip." He sighed, slipping out of his tan loincloth. That was all he had on. The witch doctor took it, brought it over to the fire pit, and threw them in. "Hey!" Duo huffed, "That was my only pair! Not only that, but Heero gave me those!"

"They're ruined, Duo. They'll never get smell out of cloth." Trowa informed him.

"Damn! So could Anana make a new one for me?"

"That could be arranged. Or you could…" Trowa grinned, "Wear the dress."

Duo glared, "You are skating on thin ice, dude. Don't push it." Trowa laughed.

"You're too much fun to tease."

Duo was about to comment, but his peepers saw the witch doctor come closer to him with that stuff. He closed his eyes to wait for the doctor to do his job. It wasn't that he was embarrassed about being naked in front of this old man, who looked remarkably in his 20s; it was because he was trying to forget who was doing this to him. Getting painted by someone who wasn't his lover was something he didn't care for.

As Dr. Akuji started to spread it on his chest, he could smell it. The goop wasn't as strong as skunk odor, but it still stank. Duo was trying to hold his breath, but couldn't manage it. He exhaled powerfully, his color coming back to his face.

Duo's ears were finally picking up a quiet chant coming from the witch doctor as he brushed the stuff on. Duo shivered; not only was the goop smelly, but it was cold.

It took almost an hour, but Duo's body was finally covered. He was completely green.

"It's not easy being green." Duo couldn't help saying. Trowa groaned at the lame joke. "So how long do I have to keep this stuff on?"

"Until you don't smell anymore."

"Gee, you ask a simple question and you get a smart-alack remark!" Duo huffed, folding his arms.

"I wasn't being sarcastic. When you are no longer stinky, from either stuff, then you get to take a bath in the river. As the goop dries, the smell gets trapped within it. It begins to flake, letting the person know that it is done drying, and you go wash it off. The dry stuff comes off, along with the smell."

"Groovy." Duo smiled. "Um… will Heero get to help me bathe?"

"I don't see why not. But you still might want to ask."

Duo shrugged, "Not a problem. I know he'd love to help me smell better."


It took an hour before the stuff began to peel, and Duo took that as an invitation to seek out his native husband. Walking naked in the village had gotten easier for him. It felt good to do, not having to worry about getting arrested for indecent exposure, but it did feel a bit weird being the only one without clothes. `Duh! I have paint on still, stupid.' He bereted to himself. `Yeah,' the other voice in his head said, `but your paint is flaking.'

Duo shook his head; he was having a mental debate with himself, and the voices sounded nothing like him. The jungle life must be getting to him. `But,' he thought, `I wouldn't trade it for the world. Heero neither.' He smiled.

He found Heero walking out of Trowa's hut. If he knew better, he would think that he was cheating on him. Duo chuckled to himself, Heero would never do that! It was one of their rules and stuff. Still, Duo continued to muse, poor Trowa must be lonely. Maybe the green-eyed man should find himself a mate too. Duo liked the thought of that. He would love to help his new friend in the whole dating service.

"Ah, there you are!" Duo smiled.

Heero smiled back. "Hi, Duo."

"Hello," Duo purred, "My handsome native! Care to join me in a bath?"

"Duo? Sop?"

Duo smiled, "You, me… bath? Um… wash? In river?"

"Soi!" Heero smiled back, "I help Duo warsh."

Duo sighed, and then decided to help Heero speak English more correctly, "NO, you say: `I… will… help… you… wash.' Now you say it."

Heero blinked. "I say?"

"Repeat. What I said…"

Heero ran the sentence again through his mind, "No… yeow ay I `ill help you warsh…"

"Ok ok… miscommunication here." Duo shook his head. "Never mind. Let's go to the river."

"River." Heero nodded. "Zambezi." Heero began to walk over toward the body of water of which he named so easily.

Duo's jaw dropped.

"Z-Zambezi??" something in his brain clicked. He knew where he was! "Oh my god! I'm in Ghana!!" Heero stopped when he heard Duo say the land's name. Duo looked over at Heero with a little sad face, "I-I knew I was in Africa somewhere but… I wasn't exactly sure." Duo looked down at his necklace, and then something hit him…

"This… this crystal… um, the juju…"

"Juju." Heero smiled.

"It's… a diamond!"




[1] The witch doctor's name means Dead & Awake. O_o perfect, ne?

Ok, so… I'm really sucky at geography and stuff, so I hunted online for river names and stuff like that and what Ghana has. It's the absolute perfect site for my story to take place! It was either that or Benin, but Ghana's languages are English and tribal languages. So, it's perfect. And yes, Ghana has diamonds. It also has cocoa, coconuts, coffee (probably beans), rice, and… gold! ^_^