5-1-2001

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the song `Eleanor Rigby`. Never have and never will.
Pairings: 1+2 (duh...)
Warnings: Shounen ai, sad, deathfic, OOC, post-EW
Rating: PG/PG-13... dunno. Pretty innocent stuff.
Feedback: Oh yeah!

[lyrics]

ELEANOR RIGBY (1+2 songfic)

[Ah, Look at all the lonely people! Ah, Look at all the lonely people!]

It was Christmas. There were people everywhere, shopping, laughing and smiling. There were families with their children, pointing enthusiastically at toys seen in the stores and running at their parent's feet. There were couples who were walking hand in hand with happy expressions, waiting for their Christmas together. There were also many friends who had decided to go shopping together.

They were all absorbed in the people around them that no one really noticed the lonely figures walking around without destination. A few of them were smiling wistfully while the others didn't want to see all the happiness around them. There was no reason to put salt into their wounds.

[Eleanor Rigby picks up the rice in the church where a wedding has been. Lives in a Dream]

The big church was now dark and empty. There were no traces of the happiness and colours that had been there earlier that day. But Heero could hear the faint echoes of the happy voices, lingering in the air, swirling around him and promising happiness.

It had been Relena's wedding and he hadn't been invited. Heero knew that every other Gundam pilot had been there. Except Duo. Heero had no idea why he hadn't been invited since had always been the happy one who kept everyone's spirits high. Even Relena had liked him. Why hadn't she invited Duo then? Heero knew that he hadn't been invited because no one knew where he lived. No one needed to know, he had no friends. Even Duo wasn't his friend. Not anymore.

Back then when they were still pilots, Heero had always dreamt of his life together with Duo. They would be together forever. But when he had finally been brave enough to tell Duo about his dream, Duo had just laughed at him. He had said that it was an impossible dream and that Heero was Duo's best friend, but he had no intentions to spend the rest of his life with him.

Heero had vanished right after the Mariemeia incident.

[Waits at the window, wearing a face that she keeps in a jar by the door, who is it for?]

His apartment was small, only one room and a narrow kitchenette. But it was enough for Heero, who spent almost all his free time sitting next to the window and looking outside. He was depressed and he admitted it to himself. He didn't have anything special to live for, but committing a suicide would be a cowardly act, and Heero Yuy was not a coward.

So he stared out of the window, thinking about his life. Sometimes he was sure that he saw Duo outside the apartment complex, walking towards the door with his long, chestnut braid swinging merrily behind him. Duo would smile and Heero would smile back at him, his heart pounding in his chest. Then the image would vanish and his small smile would disappear.

[All the lonely people, where do they all come from?]

So, Heero Yuy was not a happy person. He just didn't understand one thing. How had his life become so dull, so lifeless? It couldn't be only because of Duo, could it? He had turned down all the people who had called him a friend, but why?

[All the lonely people, where do they all belong?]

Christmas Eve. That's why you couldn't see anybody on the streets. Everyone was spending the holiday with their families, friends or lovers. One could see the joyous figures through the windows dancing, singing and having fun. The lights on the Christmas trees were casting soft shadows on the walls.

But in some of the houses you could see nothing but a cold exterior. For lonely people there was nothing to celebrate.

[Father McKenzie, writing the words to a sermon that no one will hear. No one comes near.]

"Do you, Duo Maxwell, take Heero Yuy to be your lawfully wedded husband..." Duo stared at the text that had appeared from his pen. He was working as a catholic priest in a small church located in the area where people didn't trust each other and certainly not God. God had given them nothing to make them trust Him. All they saw was death and poverty, diseases and orphans.

He lived in a small apartment inside the church. It was a miracle if someone came to the church anymore because no one in this area loved God. Even the priest himself despised Him.

Duo held his church services, but when it was time to sing, only his sad voice could be heard. He was truly alone, living in his dream world in which Heero and he lived happily together. He wouldn't have to be lonely anymore.

"I do" he said, a silent sob escaping his lips.

[Look at him working, darning his socks in the night when there's nobody there, what does he care?]

A priest's life was not a rich life. He didn't even remember when he had last bought some new clothes-as if he wore anything else than his priest garb. There were small holes in his clothes but he didn't care. After all, why should he? No one was going to come and visit him. He didn't even know if the other pilots were still alive. He hoped they were. Most of all, he wished that Heero was happy, that he had found someone to share his life with, despite Duo's idiotic rejection.

[All the lonely people, where do they all come from?]

He had given his all, his dreams and hopes, for Priesthood; but it had given him nothing back. Where was the beautiful feeling one was supposed to get when he was a child of God?

Years of war had made Duo bitter and nowadays he had nothing left but his growing hate towards God, who had taken away his life.

[All the lonely people, where do they all belong?]

His mind belonged to dull life he was living. His body belonged to the God who didn't want it. And finally, his heart belonged to Heero who had wanted it, but at that time he hadn't been ready to give it to him yet.

"Come back, Heero... and take what's yours..."

[Ah, Look at all the lonely people! Ah, Look at all the lonely people!]

Christmas was over and streets were crowded again. This time people were searching for fireworks, champagne and other things they needed to celebrate the New Year. They were looking at the lonely figures, which were walking among the masses of people their shoulders hunched, trying to avoid the looks of the others. Better not to see the pitiful looks some people were giving them.

[Eleanor Rigby died in the church and was buried along with her name. Nobody came.]

It was New Year's Eve and Heero had decided to go to church. He knew that he was probably going to be alone since he had chosen the small church outside the city center. It suited him just fine. He didn't truly believe in God, but he had decided to let his dreams come true for a little while.

He knew that Duo was Catholic, so being inside a church would bring him closer to Duo. It made perfect sense to Heero, although a small voice in his head still had doubts about that. But he was going to try. A stifled chuckle escaped Heero's lips. Maybe he was going insane...

It was peaceful inside the church. Candles cast their dim light, which made the atmosphere forgiving and almost divine. No wonder Duo had wanted to become a priest, Heero thought as he kneeled over the altar. And for the first time in years he felt the calmness spreading over his mind as he fell into an angelic slumber.

He was buried to the small cemetery behind the church because no one knew anything about him and the priest didn't want to burden anyone with it.

So he decided to bury Heero's body to the half-empty graveyard next to the small church. There was nobody in his funeral, only the black clad priest, who held the sermon.

[Father McKenzie wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave. No one was saved.]

His eyes were dry, he couldn't even cry. He had just buried Heero and blessed his body. His grave was right across his window, so that every time he looked out of it, he would see the black gravestone and the words carved in it. "Heero Yuy- Know that you were loved"

He couldn't put there the date of his birth, because he didn't know it. He didn't want to put there the date of his death, because Heero's life was eternal. He would live forever in some other dimension. He would be forbidden to Duo, forever.

And first time in years, Duo couldn't keep his tears at bay.

[All the lonely people, where do they all come from?]

Nobody had noticed the death of one lonely man. People continued living like they always did. Lonely ones continued to wish for a better life, which would surely be waiting for them somewhere. They would try to understand why they were lonely. Was the fault in them, or was the fault in others?

[All the lonely people, where do they all belong?]

Duo continued his miserable life in the small church, darning his clothes and wishing for his faith in God to return. After he had found Heeros' dead body, he had totally lost his faith. But there was no other life for him than a priest's life.

He couldn't even dream anymore, because at some point of his dream, his eyes would glance over the black, shining stone and the words written in it. Then the reality always came crashing down, and Duo often found himself sitting next to the gravestone and stroking the cold material.

There would be no salvation for him.

 

The end.