6-12-2003

Title: Revelations of the Heart
Author: Karen, The Huntress hickman@rockbridge.net
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or its characters
Pairing: 1x2, 3x4
Warning: yaoi, lemon, shounen ai, language
Part: 1/1
Feedback: Always appreciated.

Revelations of the Heart

 

1:30 a.m.

Anyone with any sense had gone to bed hours ago so the corridor was quiet as Heero Yuy made his way to the sleeping quarters. Heero was tired. No, exhausted would better describe the heaviness in both his body and his mind. His day had begun with the sunrise and seemed to drag on forever.

Problems in Wing's electrical connections had been the sole focus of his attention. The stubborn system still was not working properly but at that late hour he was well beyond the point of caring...not right then anyway.

His boots made a soft tapping on the tile floor echoing over the hallway's vacancy. However in the early morning stillness faint sounds carried a strangeness to his hearing. With every step towards the bedroom area the puzzling noises grew louder. "What in the hell?" he wondered to himself.

But somewhere in the back of his mind Heero had a good idea of the odd sound's origin. A few more long strides put him several meters from the first bedroom door. Now the muted tone's source was unmistakable.

"Damn!" Heero swore out loud. "If Quatre and Trowa want to carry on they could at least shut their door all the way."

The Wing pilot had figured something that was going on when Quatre and Trowa decided to move in together. He was certain he was not the only one who had questioned their discreet relocation but what his fellow pilots did or did not do was their business. "After all," Heero told himself, "he was not their keeper."

Heero quickened his pace determined to walk pass the invitingly ajar door. He would not be lured by the curious but obvious "pleasure noises" drifting into the hall.

"Yes, their business." he reminded himself.

But the throaty grunts and husky groans wafting from inside triggered a peculiar fascination. He found himself drawn to the door, to the irresistibly sensual sounds. "Damn!" he swore again at his inability to resist his peaked curiosity.

Heero's fingers slipped into the crack easing back the door until the space between the door and frame was wide enough to peek inside. The invading backwash from the hall was the only light that touched the darkened bedroom.

In the limited twilight illumination all he could see were two figures wiggling and twisting like a pair of enamored animals in heat. As his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting he could just make out Quatre's naked form, partly hidden by Trowa's equally nude body that was bowed up in a modified seated position. Trowa's legs, bent at the knees, parted wide to straddle Quatre's hips.

It didn't take any imagination at all to know what part of Trowa's anatomy was engaged with Quatre's quivering body. The way Quatre arched his back when his lover straightened was proof positive of the passionate union.

Each time Heavyarms' Master would throw back his head and thrust forward, Quatre would tighten his white-knuckle grip on Trowa's shoulders and pull hard into his partner's tangled embrace. A glow of sheer ecstasy shone on Quatre's face. He gritted his teeth, pressing his eyes shut with each penetrating drive of Trowa's hot manhood.

With every centered lunge, both Gundam pilots let the tenor of their sexual arousal flow freely. Some love expressions came in soft, whimpered moans accented with sudden intakes of breath. Some came in labored panting and louder, more intense, gasps of primitive abandonment to their mutual simulation.

The thought that Heero should feel guilty for encroaching on his fellow pilot's privacy briefly flickered inside his head but the idea was quickly dismissed as he became spellbound by the pair's absolute surrender to their throes of passion.

Quatre pressed his sweat-damp body hard into Trowa holding his lover in place with both arms and legs. Trowa moved his mouth near Quatre's ear and whispered something probably lascivious in nature and no doubt deliciously wicked.

The lustful breathy murmurs must have prompted the desired results. Quatre's hands roughly clasped over Trowa's shoulders. With forceful, rhythmic ramming he guided his mate to a fever pitch before they both shuddered in an exploding climax.

To muffle his lover's cries of release, Trowa's mouth parted covering Quatre's. His tongue slipped inside to taste his partner's erotic pleasure. Trowa's fingers entangled in silken blond stands as the burning kiss deepened sending warm tingling sensations flowing through both Gundam rebels.

Finally with their lips still sealed and arms and legs entwined, Quatre collapsed onto his back pulling his quivering lover down on top. The kiss ended with a final caress of their lips then, with Trowa's pumping manhood still sheathed inside, they laid together entangled in an exhausted embrace.

Trowa settled down with a sated sigh tucking his head under Quatre's chin content to stay that way awhile longer connected with his partner as Quatre's strong legs encircled his hips.

For a few more minutes Trowa would be satisfied to be held safe and warm in the comforting darkness before gently pulling out. Whether he would remain on top or slide sleepily beside his{1}kawairshii Quatre, Trowa would decide that in his own good time.

Both lovers were unaware that their shared ardor had been observed. Even if Heero's presence had been discovered, at that perfect moment of fulfillment and under the total control of their powerful emotions, neither Trowa nor Quatre would have cared. Their overmastering rapture was all that was important then.

Heero let his gaze linger on the lovers lying in their peaceful serenity. But instead of heightening of his own sexual mood the sight of the content pair enfolded in each other's arms produced a heartsick sadness.

********

Heero Yuy despite his outwardly impassive demeanor longed to be touched, to be loved. And the one person he so desperately wanted and needed to console his pain and fear was Duo Maxwell.

Heero wasn't certain when his serious feelings towards the Deathscythe pilot had begun. They had grown gradually until one day when he looked into Duo's expressive lavender eyes Heero suddenly knew that he loved him.

Heero would catch himself gazing at Duo when Duo didn't know that he was watching. Studying how the light sparkled over Duo's silky chestnut hair. Memorizing each graceful movement of his slender body as Duo walked or worked. Had that insistence and quite seductive emotional response been there since their initial meeting so many months ago?

"Do you think we will ever see a moon like this again?" Duo had asked.

The melodious tone of his voice had never completely left Heero's memories. The beautiful boy's innocence had struck a certain taut cord in Heero's hardened heart. Heero had slowly become aware of the unnamed warmth, the quiet compassionate response. Had these repressed sensitivities, lying dormant in his soul's deepest recesses, surfaced with the first locking of their eyes?

After Heero had willingly self-destructed, as he recovered under Trowa's care, the remembered sentiments for Duo had resurfaced with an unexpectedly strong potency. When he and Duo became partners once more all the latent emotions had come rushing back with such intensity that Heero wondered if his heart and soul would survive the pain.

"Oh Duo." Heero sighed closing the door, shutting out his last sight of Quatre and Trowa's peacefulness, "Why did you make me love you?"

"Damn it, Duo!" he hissed slumping on the wall fighting the stinging tears welling in his eyes, "Why?"

Now all Heero wanted to do was comfort and protect the sweet Shinigami. To make sure that nothing or no one ever hurt Duo again. To shield him from the same lonely heartsick sadness that was Heero's constant companion.

But the fear of rejection was still stronger than Heero's aching need to tell Duo how he felt. If his precious{2}koibito did not return his affection, did not agree to take their relationship a step further. If Heero's announcement of his copulative intentions were met with shock or scorn he knew that his heart would be broken with no hope of recovery.

Heero Yuy's last hope of any redemption was a sweet-natured boy who felt the same abhorrence at the senseless conflict called war. Duo was the only one who could understand how the killing, like a sucking vortex, was swamping what small degree of Heero's humanity that his hopelessness had not consumed. Yes, Duo's gentle soul was his last saving grace.

********

Like Heero, Duo had already lost too much in his young life. Perhaps the same fear of rejection was why Duo never let anyone close to his heart so he had staunchly maintained an invisible wall to keep the raw, unbearable hurt of losing family and friends at bay.

In protection of his fragile emotions Duo kept the whole world at arm's length so he could continue to fight even though he had long ago lost his will to maim and kill and destroy. Using his Gundam Deathscythe as his last refuge from the pain and fear Duo Maxwell had become a man with an expiring soul that was almost beyond reclaiming.

********

Standing in the dim hall remembering Quatre and Trowa's tender moments of love Heero knew that no matter the possible painful consequences he had to tell Duo how he felt. All five pilots faced an uncertain future, had no promise of tomorrow. Their next mission could be their last. The fleeting time and that uncertainty would not permit Heero any further hesitation.

"Tonight." Heero declared wiping tears from his eyes, "Duo has to know tonight." His cherished friend had to understand, had to accept his love and care. He had to!

Heero set every bit of his resolve firmly in his mind and made a straightway course to Duo's room. He took a steadying breath as his trembling hand closed around the doorknob. Without knocking he stepped inside. Again he paused to shore up his willpower and allow a second calming breath to flow over his lips.

Duo lay on his side facing the wall in his usual fetal-curl position. A blanket was tucked snugly around his neck so only his long braided rope of hair could be seen dangling below the coverings.

Heero stood by the bed watching the rise and fall of Duo's quiet breathing. His eyes traced the curve of Duo's slender body outlined under the blanket. He leaned nearer to get a better look at Duo's angelic face. Stray strands of bangs mingled with his feathery eyelashes. An ever-so-slight trace of a serene smile poised on his pale lips.

"*Don't wake him.* Heero's inner voice whispered, *Just watch him sleep.*

Standing in the stealthy darkness Heero almost gave into the inner urgings not to disturb his comrade. Finding a certain solace in Duo's placid countenance Heero hesitated. "No." he augured lowly against his internal council's orders.

"NO!" he shook his head raising his voice above the unsolicited advice ringing in his ears. Then Heero held his breath hoping that his voice's higher pitch would not startle Duo from his tranquil slumber.

Finally with his hand trembling worse than before Heero made the finial commitment and tentatively touched Duo's shoulder. "Duo." he called firming up the pressure, "Duo wake up."

Duo stirred with a sigh. His eyelids blinked as his mind tried to decide if the calling of his name and the warmth on his shoulder was real or a dream. "Duo." Heero repeated to help clear the confusion in the pilot's sleep-dull perceptions.

Finally Duo's head turn and his large expressive eyes looked directly into Heero's face.

"Heero?" his voice's inflection questioned his friend's presence. Again his lavender eyes blinked in an unsure reaction to Heero's cobalt sight peering back.

"What's wrong?" he asked sleepily. "Do we have a mission?"

"No but I need to talk to you."

"Now?"

"Yes, please its important."

Duo stretched the kinks from his neck and shoulders then, with a heavy exhalation, sat up against the bed's headboard. "All right." he said smoothing down the blanket over his chest, "It must be important for you to wake me." he reasoned.

Heero sat down on the bed inches from the object of his affectionate interest. He lowered his head knowing that if his misty eyes locked with Duo's questioning gaze he would never be able to speak.

"Hey." Duo whispered becoming alarmed by Heero's eye's downward cast, knowing instinctively that something was bothering his brother-in-arms. He moved his hand until it rested lightly on Heero's leg. The tender touch caused Heero to close his eyes so tight that a single tear tracked down his cheek.

"I know something is wrong." Duo insisted, "Tell me."

Heero paused to bolster the courage to make his declaration, to avow his true feelings. Heero had never been good at wordy sentences, most of the time he hardly spoke at all. Even Duo's patience but relentless coaxing to get him to be more open had failed miserably.

Now Heero not only had to speak boldly but profess his heart's most guarded secrets. He was about to bare his soul not knowing if his earnest testimony would be accepted or rejected. Not knowing if, that night, his soul would be reborn or lost forever.

Duo's fingers spreading over Heero's leg, although completely innocence in their intensions, radiated hot waves that could be keenly felt through his pants thick fabric. Their tingling was almost unendurable.

Without any further reservations as to Duo's reaction, Heero reached down taking Duo's hand in his. The Deathscythe pilot stiffened slightly at the unexpected move but he made no attempt to pull free from the entwining fingers strong grip.

Heero hoped that Duo's willingness to keep his hand in place meant he would be more receptive to what he was about to hear. At least, maybe, he would be willing to listen and not pass judgment until Heero finished what he had to say.

*Do it now!* Heero's mind commanded.

"Duo." he began as his heart pounded hard in his chest, "I..." His voice trailed off with a fear-gripped shiver.

"I can't." Heero told his inner council.

*Yes you can.* his heart answered back, *You cannot forsake your feelings.*

"I have to tell you how I feel." Heero declared blurting out the words before his nerve had a chance to desert him once more.

Duo lifted his face and centered his clear sight squarely on Heero's exquisite features. Heero hoped it was not his imagination but he swore that Duo's hand tightened in his.

Then without any sense of uncertainty, without faltering or pause, Duo cupped his hand behind Heero's head guiding it down until he was face to face with his precious partner.

"I know." Duo whispered the breathy words brushing Heero's face.

Before Heero could think, before his mind could comprehend or his heart grasp the reality, Duo's lips delivered a brushing kiss. Duo's arms moved to encircle his partner who gave totally into the embrace. The next kiss, ruled by tender desire, was not hungry but as soft and sweet as Duo's loving nature.

When Duo leaned back tears misted over his eyes. One crystal droplet slid over his pale cheek. Heero caught the iridescent moisture on his thumb as it stroked his soul mate's velvety skin. "But..." he whispered choking back his own renewed crying.

Duo smiled his eyes glowing like watery pools, glistening with an inner light produced by joy. "Oh Heero." he sighed, "I know. I have known for a long time."

"Why didn't you say something?" Heero wondered as confusion swelled in emotional waves inside him.

"I thought I was reading the signs correctly," Duo stated, "but I was not sure. I was afraid that if I had misinterpreted your body language, your longing gazes and said something wrong..." he paused as another shimmering tear spilled from his large eyes.

"You were afraid that I might reject you." Heero finished the statement.

Duo nodded "yes". His bottom lip quivered as he fought against breaking down altogether.

"That is exactly why I didn't say anything before now." Heero confessed, "I knew I couldn't bear the heartache if you rejected my love."

Burying his face in Heero's chest Duo let his tears flow freely. "We both have been so foolish."

Heero wrapped his arms about his sobbing lover, "Not foolish, just fearful."

Duo steadied his voice with a shaky sigh, "Many nights I went to your room. I stood by your bed watching you sleep and prayed that you would sense me staring at you and wake up." He took in another deep breath closing his eyes, "So many nights I resisted the urge to tell you that I loved you."

Duo melted into Heero's secure embrace as a passionate kiss flooded his aching soul with warmth that he had never known before. Heero ended the kiss then allowed his to lips brush across his willing lover's tear-streaked cheek. "What do we do now?" he whispered.

Duo settled into Heero's arms and smiled, "We take it slow. Take our time to discover all the wonderful pleasures our love can give us."

"Come here." Duo invited moving over to make room for Heero to share his bed.

Heero slipped in facing his beloved Duo Maxwell. Duo rested his head on Heero's shoulder, tucked his hands under his chin and nestled his body perfectly into the curve of his partner's taller frame.

Enfolding his arms about his sweet koibito, Heero pulled Duo as close as he could. Duo bent one knee carefully slipping it between Heero's legs until it pressed lightly into his crotch.

Heero's breath caught as a hot wave tingled through his genitals and down both legs but he would resist his body's yearnings for that night. In his loving wishes that Duo be completely comfortable with their newly shared feelings he wanted to give Duo all the time he needed. He wanted their first sexual union to be love, not the product of lustful desire.

Entwined in his soul mate's arms, like his last sight of Quatre and Trowa's quiet contentment, Heero was satisfied to wait. Satisfied just to lie side by side with the savior of his soul. To fall asleep in the solace of Duo's unconditional care.

Their physical love would come along when the time was right flowing freely, hand in hand, with their heart and soul's spiritual awakening. Heero and Duo would explore all the varied emotional sensations as, together, they learned to pleasure each other in the special way only two people who truly love each other can.

{3}"Oyasumi nasai, my koibito." Heero whispered lowly

"Love you." Duo murmured as he drifted off to sleep cradled in his lover's arms.

 

~Owari~

 

1. Kawairshii--sweet or lovely

2. Koibito--lover

3. Oysasumi nasai--good night

Revelations of the Heart--Karen Hickman--June 2003