Title: "Looking for Longing : The Story of Christian & Simon : Part 3"
Part: 6/?
Pairings: 1x2/2x1
Notes: AU, shounen-ai, yaoi, name switching, time difference, some out of characterness and death. EXTRA NOTE: Heero is extremely out of character in these next few installments. The Christian & Simon stories will be told in they're own seperate parts due to the fact that I love these two characters. Don't get confused, this is the 3rd part to the Christian & Simon story for the 6th part for Looking for Longing. Get it? Got it. Good.
Disclaimer: Don't own the Gundam Boys, 'specially not Heero and Duo. Nope, don't own them, don't claim them as mine, don't sue me and we'll get along fine.
~*~ :Indicates dream sequence

The rocks rolled underneath his bare feet as the boredom set in once again. Lifting his head, his dark blue eyes adjusted to the small birth of light shining into the dungeon hole, a small smile managing across his bruised and filthy face. Every move he made set off a reaction of clattering chains and bolts. He sighed to himself and leaned against the wall, bringing one knee up to rest on. 'One day left.. tommorow..shall be my final day. Tis a pity I cannot even see you before I am exiled.' He thought to himself, his expression suddenly changing to a saddened state.

"Hey you.. pathetic excuse for a human..up and at them, you have a visitor."

Simon snarled at the guard and slowly stood, letting his legs shift and adjust. He groaned in pain as the lashings on his back felt as if they were ready to split open again. He walked his sore body over to the bars of the cell and laid his face against the cold steel.


A small face peered at him from beneath a brown cloth, bright violet eyes followed by rivers of tears.


The cobalt eyes widened in surprise and his hand shot out, quickly stopped by the chains, try as he might he could not reach out and carress the lovely features of his lover.

"Christian..what are you doing down here? If your father catchs you.."

"Screw him. I do not care what he thinks anymore." The soft hands of the prince placed themselves ontop of the calloused hands of the knight. "I've tried to come see you so many times, but every time I attempt to sneak out, either father or mother sends someone to check on me."

Simon's eyes softened and his face relaxed, leaned up against the bars he listened to the beauty talk continously, like he had the habit of doing. He traced the gentle fingers with his own and inhaled the intoxicating aroma that he had missed so much.

"Simon..when you leave tommorow. Let me come with you."

The words popped Simon's brain back into reality, with a sigh he turned from the adoring eyes of Christian and pressed his back against the frames.

"I'm sorry Christian..but I do not believe that would be in your best interest. You are...after all, a prince. There will come a day when your country will need you." Simon's eyes clouded over into a gray color as he stared at the wall, he felt the nimble fingers of Christian clutching onto any part of Simon he could reach.

"... But Simon.. they don't need me the way I need you."

Try as he might, Simon could not swallow the hard lump rising in his throat. Just hearing those words paralyzed him from any movement.

"Please Simon, look at me."

Sucking up all the courage he could and hiding his tears as best as possible, his sore body slowly turned. Their eyes connected again and everything around them had dissapeared.

"I will not give up on you. No matter what reasons you give Simon, I refuse them all. I am ready to give it all up.."

The dark haired boy only shook his head, trying to knock his emotions loose.

"Noo.. Christian, please don't say such things! It only makes this harder.."

Christian's hands shot out and grabbed those of Simon's, pulling him up against the cold bars once again, their noses barely touching.

"We can make this work."

Simon's mouth motioned to speak, only to be restrained with the soft lips of his lover. Tasting the salty tears from earlier, Simon allowed himself to melt into the kiss, letting his emotions take over. The clanking of chains interrupted the couple. Simon's dark complextion had turned a ghost white, while Christian's cheeks were stained a pinkish color.

"Please Simon. Don't give up."

"Christian, you are not understanding this situation. Don't you see that all this is happening for a reason?"

"Reason.. I need no reason to love you."

Simon's eyes cast themselves downward.

"Dammit. Christian.. this is it.. our final time as.. us. After tommorow everything will return to the way it was before I came here. You will.. *choke* marry.. and I will make my life as painless as possible."

Christian's face had already turned into a grief stricken shock. His lips trembled slightly and his hands wrapped themselves up in the brown fabric.

"I...refuse. I will not let you leave.. I do not know how to live with out you. You are my everything, you have completed this soul..my heart. I can't picture.."

"Please stop. Christian.."

"I will not let you go..I will die slowly without you. I am already dying inside."

In the shadows of the doorway leading to the dungeon, the Queen stood, her face frozen with a blank stare as she listened to the words exchanged between the two boys.

"I am sorry Christian."

"You're sorry.. why.. you're not leaving Simon.. YOU CAN'T!!"

Simon's hands reached out and held gently onto the shaking hands of his lover's.

"Listen to me. Perhaps one day, I don't know when or how, but one day.. we will able to be together. We won't have to worry about parents or what people think..we can just fall in love with each other..every day of our lives, until we die."

The queen's legs had long since given out and she know sat on the dingy steps of the dark dungeon, her eyes letting the small rapids of tears trickle down her cheeks, her hands covering up her mouth to keep herself from making any noise.

"Christian..I promise I will find you again. Even if I have to go through thousands of lifetimes with out you..I will come back to you."

Christian's knees began to wobble as he held onto his knight tightly, his sobs becoming loud and uncontrollable. His face buried in whichever part of Simon's shoulder he could reach. Both could feel each other's body reacting to the emmense pain and suffering each were enduring.

"I love you simon."


The Queen made her way back up the stairs, her hands still covering her grief stricken face. A sick feeling came into her stomach and she leaned against the wall for support.

"My poor son.."

She stood, firmly against the wall, waiting for Christian's ascent up the stairwell. Guards and hand maidens passed by her with not a word of her tear stained face and puffy eyes, the only bowed to her and kept on their way. A few moments later she heard the clomping of footsteps approaching. A heartbroken Christian turned the corner, dropping the wrap onto the floor and wiping away the salty drops off of his eyes. The Queen stepped out in front of him and gazed down at her son with an apologetic look across her face.

"Mother.." With a loud cry he fell into her arms and allowed himself to crumble into convulsive tears once again. "Mother.."

She laid trembling hands atop of his head and brushed back his long hair, feeling the silky strands between her fingers. She knelt down and held him in her arms, allowing him to shudder his feelings into her embrace.

"My son, my darling son. What can I say."

Christian only contiuned to sob, his body eventually giving out from lack of sleep and too much stress. Falling asleep in the midst of crying, the queen carried him up into this room and slipped him under his blankets. Kissing him on the temple she brushed back his hair just a bit and sighed.

"I am so sorry Christian." Was all she could manage to say as she exited the room, letting her son get some much deserved sleep.


The sunlight slipped through the room as quietly as a mouse, only disturbing the sleeping boy a bit. He shuttered in his sleep and with a start, quickly sat up, his brow drenched in sweat.


He leapt from his bed, pulling his hair back as he ran down the large master stair case. His barefeet patted against the hard floor, his face full of panic. He bust through the main doors leading into the palace and ran out into the large field overlooking the back of the pasture. His eyes scanned the horizon, looking for any sign of his beloved.

His eyes felt heavy as the salty tears started to flood his beautiful colored lenses. The wind swept his hair over his shoulder, pushing the long tresses out in a long flowing rainbow of chestnut. He pushed back the purple cape that started to encircle itself around his right leg, he sighed as he watched from the distance. With a wipe of his eyes he turned and headed back for the palace, his hands trembling and his heart breaking.

"Father how could you?!" His voice rang throughout the hollowed hallways of the large stone castle. "I hate you for this!!!" He turned quickly and pounded his fists into the stone over and over again, his voice becoming louder. He was filled with hatred...with loathing...with sorrow.

"CHRISTIAN! What in God's name are you doing?!" The female voice came from behind, he turned his head slightly and peered over his shoulder. The tears ran freely down his face, they're beautiful color had diminished until all that was left was a blood shot red stain across the violet eyes.

"Go away..Milia I'm not in the mood for one of your talks."

"Christian..you must talk with me, after all I am your fiancee now." He reminded him with a quick smile. A scowl crept across his face as he faced her.

"You. Are not. MY FIANCEE! Do you get that? I don't love you, I don't even want to look at you! This is your fault..this is all your fault!!!" She flinched as he punched the wall behind her, nearly missing her pale face.

"Just stay away from me Milia." He turned on his heels and dashed up the stairs into his main chambers, the door slamming made the whole bottom level shake. Her soft blue eyes gazed up at the stair well, wondering if she should go after him.

"No Milia, you stay right there." A voice from the corner caught her off guard, causing her to jump slightly. Her eyes widened at the appearance of the princess. With a bow she smiled up at the older girl.

"Princess Anna. Forgive me, I did not see you there."

"Tis why I hid in the corner, that argument between you and Christian was astounding. Are you not the least bit hurt?"

"By your brother's comments? Why should I? He knows what he must do, no matter what happens, he will marry me."

"You're such a fool Milia. Even if our father says he must marry you, I know him much better than that."

"It's not that difficult winning over a boy like him."

"You're right. And you're not that person."


Duo's eyes flashed open violently, his hand quickly releasing the psychic's.

"NANI?!?!?! No..no.. Heero.. Heero and I.. we can't have that much history." Duo was for once..left speechless.

The psychic only nodded at the frightened boy and rubbed his arm gently.

"Are you going to be alright? I know this is alot for you to swallow, but your pasts never lie."

"Gomen. But I must go." Duo grabbed his coat and ran through the door, tripping a bit as he came to a run in the street. His long braid trailing behind him, bouncing along with each step.

'How can this be.. me and Heero.. Heero and I. But he acts nothing like the other two. Maybe this is a challenge for me, confront my feelings and be with the one who I love. Baka Duo, the only thing Heero is going to do is look at you funny and tell you he's going to kill you.'

Duo's thoughts continued to plauge his mind as he came up the stairs leading into Quatre's home. As he walked in through the door he swallowed the lump rising in his throat and threw his coat onto the rack.

"Halllllllo? Anyone home?"

"Hai." A flat voice came from the living room. Duo only groaned slightly and hid the blush in his cheeks as he walked past Mr. Yuy himself, who had made himself comfortable on the couch reading a magazine.


A small jump and Duo covered it quickly.

"HAI?!" He practically screamed. He wapped himself on the forehead and sat down in the chair next to Heero, only recieving a strange look in return.

"Anything interesting?" Heero asked flatly, continuing to read his article.

"You could say that.."

"Mind sharing?"

"Heero, you actually want to hear me talk?"

A shrug of the strong shoulders and Duo smirked to himself, leaning back in the chair.

"Do you believe in reincarnation?"

I think the next part will probably be the next part unless I plan on dragging it on anymore than it already has been. I know some of you are sick of it, but hey I like it. I'm a bit dissapointed in this parts final pieces but pfft.. oh well. FEEDBACK IS MORE THAN WELCOMED! Arigatou Minna, sorry for the crossposting and enjoy!