TITLE: Hold on
Author: Fenella
Rated: hmmm... PG? I dunno...
pairings: 1+2
Song by: Sarah McLachlan
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing *Sigh* or the lyrics
Warnings: Death fic


~/~ = lyrics


~hold on.
hold on to yourself
for this is gonna hurt like hell.
hold on.
hold on to yourself,
you know that only time can tell
what is it in me that refuses to believe,
this isn't easier than the real thing.~

Quatre opened the door to the hospital room, slowly and silently. He looked at the two other people in the room, and his eyes filled with sorrow.

"Heero," he whispered to the shaggy, brown-haired boy sitting in a chair. Heero looked up at the blonde pilot, his cobalt eyes filled with tears. Quatre, used to seeing those eyes cold, and unfeeling, hesitated. "Heero," he started again, "Heero, you've been in here for almost 48 hours. You need to eat something. I'll sit in here for you, if you want."

Heero shook his head. "I'm not hungry."


"Go away, Quatre. Please." Quatre sighed, and left the room as quietly as he had come in.

~my love,
you know that you're my best friend,
you know i'd do anything for you
and my love,
let nothing come between us,
my love for you is strong and true.~

Heero looked at the young man lying unconscious on the hospital bed, the only sounds being the sound of both their breathing, and machine hooked to his heart, which beeped quietly whenever his heart beat. Heero took one hand off of the hand his was grasping, and brought it up to the other boy's face, stroking it softly. He then brushed a few loose strands of chestnut hair out of his closed eyes.

"Duo..." he spoke softly. "Duo, come back to me...come back..." Heero silently choked back a sob.

~am i in heaven here,
or am i...
at the crossroads
i am standing.~

Duo looked all around him, but all he could see was a bright white light. He could fell the presence of someone, and he swore he could hear the voice of someone familiar. The voice of Heero.

"Heero?" He asked. When no one answered he tried again. "HEERO!?" He listened a little longer, straining his ears.

~so now you're sleeping peaceful,
i lie awake and pray,
that you'll you be strong tomorrow
and will see another day,
and we will praise it
and love the life that brings a smile
across your face.~

"Oh Duo," Heero continued. "Why? Why did you have to go and do that?"


"Damn!" Heero swore as he piloted Wing Zero. Quatre, piloting Sandrock next to him, popped up in the corner of the screen.

"There's so many of them! And this new mobile doll model is tough!"

"Yeah," Heero said in agreement.

The five pilots had been fighting in their gundams for almost three hours, and they were really starting to tire. The OZ mobile dolls were strong and quick, and they just seemed to keep coming and coming. Suddenly, a distressed Duo popped up in another corner of Heero's screen.

"I need some help here! The mobile dolls have blown of my scythe, and I'm all out of ammunition! I don't think Deathsythe hell here is gonna last much longer!"

"Hang on a sec Duo, I'll be right there!" Heero turned his gundam to face Duo's direction, and was about to shoot of, when suddenly, a pack of mobile dolls came straight towards his gundam. "Shit!"

"Heero, I don't think you can make it in time."

"Duo! Don't say that! I'll make it!" Heero kept fighting as hard as he could, but after a minute or so, Duo spoke again.

"Deathsythe is almost dead. But I won't let OZ have him."

"No Duo! Don't even think about it! No!"

"I have to Heero!"

"No Duo!"

"I can't let them get it!"

"No Duo!"

"Good bye Heero."

"NO! DUO!"

"I love you, Heero." Heero finally realized that Duo wasn't going to change his mind.

"Damnit Duo! I love you too." Heero watched Duo as he closed his beautiful violet eyes and pushed the self-destruct button. Then the screen turned to fuzz. Heero filled with anger.

"Damn you, OZ!" Heero plowed through the mobile suits like an elephant through underbrush towards where Deasthye Hell had been moments ago. There, floating among the rubble, was Duo's battered body.

Heero used his gundam to scoop him up gently, and then flew off, leaving any mobile suits following him in the dust.


~oh god,
if you're out there won't you hear me.
i know that we've never talked before.
and oh god,
the man i love is leaving,
will you take him when he comes
to your door.~

Quatre, after talking with Trowa and Wufei, had decided to talk to Heero again.

"Heero?" He asked, whispering again, "are you sur-"

"Quatre?" Heero asked, interrupting, like he hadn't even known the other pilot had been speaking. "Do you think Duo will go to heaven?" Quatre took a seat next to Heero.

"Duo will be fine. And he would go to heaven anyways. He always fought for what was right."

"But he killed so many people. I mean, we all did."

"But it was always for what was right."

Heero nodded, then spaced out again, only seeing and hearing Duo.

~am i in heaven here,
or am i in hell,
at the crossroads
i am standing~

Duo, still only seeing bright light, suddenly started hearing a soft singing sound. It was a beautiful sound, and it reminded him of the Sunday church choir at the Maxwell church. He took one step towards the direction of the sound, then stopped. He looked behind him. Even though he didn't see anything, he hesitated. He had a feeling maybe he should go that way. He debated in his mind which way he should go.

~so now you're sleeping peaceful,
i lie awake and pray,
that you'll you be strong tomorrow
and will see another day,
and we will praise it
and love the life that brings a smile
across your face.~

Quatre, realizing Heero didn't know he was there anymore, decided he should be left alone, and departed.

Heero continued staring at Duo, praying and wishing for him to wake up, when suddenly Duo took in a deep breath, and machine hooked to his heart stopped beeping. The room was silent as Heero shook his head in disbelief.

"No," he whispered. "No Duo, no. NO DUO! DON'T LEAVE ME! NO!" All the tears Heero had been holding in came loose.

~Hold on.
Hold on to yourself
for this is gonna hurt like hell.~

Heero, still sobbing, lay his head down on Duo's chest, listening for a heartbeat that wasn't there.


i hope you liked it! please R+R!