12-4-2000

Title: The 13 days of Christmas
Authors:Duoette and Lil*Shinigami
Pairings:1x2,2x1
Warnings:limey
Disclaimer: We do not own the song "The 12 days of Christmas" we just twisted it evilly. And as for Duo and Heero <hentai, hentai, hentai>, we do not own them either. <Both authors go to their rooms to pout.>

 

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
A brand new gundam suit.

On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Two great blow-jobs,
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Three laptops,
I'm gonna fuck you stupid,
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the forth day of Chrismas, my true love gave to me,
Four silk boxers,
Heero... it's beeping!
Well, if you REALLY want to...
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Five cups of tea.
When am I gonna wear these?
Why three laptops?
Why are you tying me up?
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Six pairs of handcuffs,
Five cups of tea.
Heero, you ripped it!
Three laptops,
Dammit Heero, don't STOP!
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Seven tubes of lube,
Ooooh, new toys!
Five cups of tea.
I like the hole there,
Where's the damn outlet?!
<various moans, groans, and the like>
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Eight cans of whipped cream,
Seven? Why SEVEN?!
Um... where's the key?
Five cups of tea.
It's too loose, it slipped,
Watch the Hampsters dance!
What do you mean "too tired", Duo?
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Nine spandex shorts,
Ooh... my favorite brand,
ALL of them? TONIGHT!!?
NOT like that! Like -click- SHIT!!!
Five cups of tea.
They're dry-clean ONLY!
It froze again!
H-Heero? What's with the- Mmph!
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Ten shiny guns,
They're too tight!
Now you're all sticky!<giggle, giggle>
Dammit, where's the lube?!
They're not unlocking!
Five cups of tea.
Heero! You made it rip again!
Now how the HELL do you turn it off?!
Two blow-jobs
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Eleven hair-cuts,
OMAE O KOROSU
They're chafing!
Eight cans of whipped cream,
Well where did you PUT the lube?!
This is so NOT cool!
Five cups of tea.
Four silk boxers,
Stop typing!
Why are you smiling like that?
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Twelve secret missions,
Not my BRAID!
Can we kill Relena?
Spandex don't hide much,
It tastes good!
We used it ALL?!!!
Get them OFF me!!!
Five cups of tea.
Put them on, take them off, put them on...
Why is it fricken' humming?
Ninmu karyou.
And a brand new gundam suit.

On the thirteenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me,
Mmph <THUD.BANG.>
Duo:<pops up, braid swinging.> I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!
Heero: Hn. <drags Duo back by his braid.>

 

OWARI

Duo:WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!!? Heero, you're too quiet! What are you thinking?
Heero: Nothing... just... you would look good in silk boxers. Especially black.
Duo:<leering> JUST boxers?
Heero:How about nothing? <drags Duo out of the room> <hentai, hentai, hentai.>