10-2-2001

Title: Nothing But You
By Dragonfriend
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.
Diamond: Is that it?
DF: No, of COURSE it isn't it, baka!
Anubis: So finish then…
DF: There will be MILD 1x2 here… AND I don't own "Nothing But You." It's a song by Kim Ferron and on the Buffy: The Vampire Slayer Soundtrack. I wish I owned both. But I don't. Live with it. Oh, and I borrowed Heero's mind for this!

 

Duo followed me down the hall, talking constantly as he usually did. Not that I cared, really. It was the talking that got to me. So, finally, I spotted a coat peg and on it was my jacket. The leather jacket that Duo had bought for me…on my birthday no less! He loved that thing, loved the way I looked in it. I smiled at that…

And Duo's voice, piercing through my mind right then and there. Letting out a growl of annoyance, I pushed past Duo and walked over to the coat peg, slinging my coat around my shoulders.

"Hee…Hee-koi? What are you doing?" Duo asked, curiously.

"I'm going out. I need to get out of here…" I replied, opening the door and closing it behind me quickly.

"In the rain?!" I could hear his surprised voice call out behind me as I slammed the door shut.

***********************************

I think I'll go for a walk
Maybe out in the rain
Maybe there'll be tears rolling down my face
And I'd feel the pain
Maybe think about something.
Maybe think about you

***********************************

I ignored the raindrops slamming into my face. Only earlier today had Duo decided to break the news to me that he wasn't sure, but that he MIGHT have some sort of terminal illness. And he hadn't bothered to tell me that…why?! That just aggravated me.

I walked. I wasn't sure where I was going, nor did I care. The person I held most dear to my heart might die. He hadn't told me before now because he "didn't want to worry me." Damn it, I was worried enough all ready! Duo might die!

The words kept repeating over and over in my head like some sort of twisted mediation mantra. Duo could die. Duo could die.

***********************************

Yeah you can't hurt me now
You know you can't hurt me now
You can't hold me down.

***********************************

Duo could die. Would it be my fault, because I couldn't save him? Because I couldn't do anything to help him? He had waited THIS long to tell me! I couldn't believe how stupid that had been! He knew I was going to be upset! He KNEW! And yet he didn't bother to tell me. How terrible was that? To know that he could die…even tonight…and I would only have just found out about it. He could have been dead before now. I would just wake up the next morning and find his still form next to me on the bed, his un-braided hair falling over parts of me and mostly over him.

And he'd be gone. Just like that.

***********************************

And I've got plenty of time
Time to figure it out
Time to think about you and me
Whatever that was all about
Got nothing to prove
Got nothing to say
No I'm guessing I never thought you were good for me
anyway
Got nothing to loose
Nothing but you.

***********************************

I continued to walk, the rain mingling with the salty tears that flowed down my face, staining my usual green tank top and my leather jacket. I remembered the day that Duo gave me the coat. We had just bombed an OZ facility. We had agreed that my birthday celebration would be simple. Nothing elaborate. And no presents. I had told him no presents and yet he got me one all the same. The leather jacket. My left hand reached up to caress the right sleeve of the leather, let it roam up and down the slippery black material until I couldn't bear to think of it any more. Letting out a cry of annoyance, I slid the thing off of my body and tossed it behind me.

And I started to run.

***********************************

I think I'll go for a ride
Til my memory fades
Roll down the windows and glide
Down 75 to the Everglades
Maybe light up a join
And take a walk on the moon

Yeah you can't reach me now.
You know you can't touch me now.
You can't bring me down.

***********************************

I continued to run, never looking behind me, hearing only the sound of raging thunder somewhere in the distance and the steady downpour of rain on the sidewalk. Tears stung my eyes and I hurriedly brushed them away. What would I do without Duo? What would I do?

Everything started to blur with a flood of memories I can't control. Duo telling me he has some sort of terminal illness and telling me not to worry. Duo handing me the box which I unwrap to discover the leather coat inside. Deathscythe standing next to Wing as we, together, blow up an Oz facility. The first time I met Duo.

Duo…

"Duo, you can't leave me. Not after everything we've been though. I can't live without you…"

***********************************

And I've got plenty of time
Time to figure it out
Time to think about you and me
Whatever that was all about
Got nothing to prove
Got nothing to say
No I'm guessing I never thought you were good for me
anyway
Got nothing to loose
Nothing but you
Nothing but you…

***********************************

Something screamed as I ran past it. It might have been a truck, but I'm not sure. So many things blurred together on the side. My vision (probably from all the tears in my eyes), my memories of Duo…mainly my memories of Duo.

Duo…

Duo could die. Duo could die. Duo could die. Duo could die…

For some reason, my mind traveled back to the day when I first realized I loved him. It was during a mission and I realized that I couldn't think of anyone else I'd rather go into battle with than Duo. I realized that I couldn't think of anyone else being near me but Duo. No one but him. Only him. Forever.

"Duo…you can't leave me. You complete me…who I am," I sobbed, swiping tears away from my eyes again.

Its cold. The rain has completely soaked through my clothes. I'm freezing. I'm wet. I'm unhappy. And its all Duo's fault. Because he waited to damn long to tell me he could die.

***********************************

Why do you have to be so unkind?
Why do I have to be so inclined
To loose my mind?

***********************************

"I LOVE YOU, DUO!" I heard myself scream in aggravation as I sink to my knees onto wet grass. I slammed my fist into the earth, pounding the soggy blades of grass and mud with my enraged hand. "I love you…"

And the tears that I had been trying to prevent flowed uncontrollably down my face.

***********************************

Well I've got plenty of time
Time to figure it out
Time to think about you and me
Whatever that was all about
Got nothing to prove
Got nothing to say
No I'm guessing I never thought you were good for me
anyway
Got nothing to loose…
Nothing but you

***********************************

Out of nowhere, I spotted a shadow falling over me. I glanced up through tear streaked eyes to see Duo standing there, a jean jacket over his form, holding an umbrella in one hand and the jacket I had torn off in my frustration in the other.

"I love you, too, Hee-koi," Duo said softly, holding the umbrella over me. "I got your coat for you. You dropped it back there, you know. I've been trying to catch up to you for the longest time…ever since you left------"

I jumped up from the ground and Duo backed away, like he thought I was going to lash out at him. Instead, I wrapped him up in a hug, pressing myself close to him. I didn't want to let go. I didn't want to release the memories I had of him.

"I love you, Duo-koi," I whispered. "I don't want you to leave me…you complete who I am. Please…don't leave me…"

Duo seemed a bit taken about by the onslaught of emotion I was presenting him with. I was usually Mr. Un-emotional, the guy who would be straight-faced at a stand-up comic. And I was crying and hugging him.

"Well, I'm here now. We're in the park, aren't we?" Duo asked, winking at me. "Only couples come to the park. Let's take a walk."

"Yes…" I replied. "Just as long as you don't leave me now."

"I won't, Hee-koi. Not now. I promise."

And now I realize, standing next to Duo who is holding an umbrella over my head with his free arm wrapped around my sopping waist and leather coat, I never want to be without him.

I don't think I could survive with anyone else but him.

 

~*OWARI*~

 

DF: So, what did you think? Like? Dislike?
Duo: I'm gonna die?
DF: ::falls over:: Where did YOU come from?
Heero: You borrowed us for the fic, remember?
DF: Yeah, but you aren't my muses!
Heero and Duo: So?
DF: ::sigh::