11-16-2000

 

poem from duo's pov for my multi-part "find me" ^___^

 

why does it hurt so bad
no one can understand
tribulations
contemplations
examinations
into a soul i cannot call my own
break me down
and scatter my pieces
ashes to the wind
and memories to the skies

why do i try not to cry
when i know tears won't make me die
but silently
passively
unknowingly
i wipe dry eyes and try to smile
the voices call me
from within
achingly softened
and threatening to disappear

why can't i find a shread of love
damned karma reaches me; what have i done?
night dances
lack of answers
insanity advances
and i hide although i shame my pride
father claim me
i feel eternally lost
the darkness is ever present
and the cold awaits

why are the two eyes i find myself drawn to
cold but warm, the deepest of blues
confused
refused
feeling used
but i step forward, toward...
he makes me almost
start to smile
makes me start to live
like i never have before